Used to be nudity killed your career.
But that was back when movie stars didn't do television, before everything we knew turned out to be wrong.
Where's that girl in the Billy Idol video today?
And while you're at it, where are the girls in the Robert Palmer video?
I've got no idea.
Emily Ratajkowski may not be a star tomorrow, but she's positively global today, all because of her appearance in the Robin Thicke video.
It was the only thing that had me watching, who was the girl with the perfect breasts?
And then I wrote about it and started getting e-mail...she was all over Tumblr!
But it's hard to talk about sex and bodies in America, the blowback is...
But I'm at dinner tonight, and Lisa brings up the girl in the video and the two thirtysomething women immediately chime in, "If I had a boob job I'd want hers!"
Huh?
That's the difference between yesterday and today, women own not only their bodies, but their sexuality. And that's how Emily Ratajkowski ended up being the star of the "Blurred Lines" video. Hell, she's new, the song is not.
But are they real?
That's what everybody at dinner was wondering.
So I took to the Internet...
Whereupon I found conflicting opinions. Men saying they were definitely natural and women, on a breast implant site, claiming they saw telltale scars.
And then I found this:
https://twitter.com/realemrata/status/289577960200105985/photo/1
For those too lazy to click through, this is Emily Ratajkowski's Twitter feed, and it says...
"For those meanies that insist I have had a boob job, here I am at 14 sooooo pic.twitter.com/MMZZvAMr"
Well that solves that, they're natural.
But what stuns me is there's no handler, no PR person saying no, it's just unfiltered Emily, responding to her critics on her Twitter feed with 66,217 followers.
She took control of her own career, she demanded the ball and is running down the field and everybody in the demo knows all about it, and the baby boomers who control the mainstream media are clueless.
Yes, the oldsters might be afraid of boobies in the wild, but to the youngsters they're as de rigueur as gay marriage. Yup, that's how fast things change, we've got a black President, legal dope and homosexuals are getting married. If you think you can jet us back to the past, I'd like to see your rocket ship.
1. There are no rules. Profanity may be taboo on network TV and terrestrial radio, but it's an everyday occurrence out in the wild. The oldsters are in future shock, the youngsters know that not only does nothing last forever, yesterday is history and if you were big then, you might be nobody now, so you'd better capitalize on your moment of fame.
2. The definition of a star has broadened. Used to be a star had talent. Today, that's not the case, unless you consider self-promotion a talent, and to be truthful, it is!
3. Capitalize on what you've got. Don't downplay your assets, embrace them. Don't try to be a musician if you can't sing or play, there are many more ways to gain the fame you want, and they're probably easier to achieve.
4. Young is not the clothes you wear, but who you are inside. In other words, you can get plastic surgery and wear skinny jeans and still be an antique. We're going through the greatest cultural revolution since the sixties, only this time the baby boomers are the odd people out, they're the parents. Revolution was enabled back then by radio and the music, today it's enabled by the Internet. Yes, the Internet is the tool, and it's enhanced by smartphones and Twitter and Instagram and...you can build your own identity online, don't pooh-pooh it, that's today's reality!
5. The Internet could kill American puritanism. Kids who grow up sexting are not afraid of their bodies.
6. Everyone can play, the tools are cheap. Used to be it was expensive to make a record, not only is it cheap to make a record today, it's cheap to make a YouTube video, tweet and have an online identity. Yes, today's kids are embracing the sixties ethos of freeing their minds and becoming who they want to be, since the baby boomers wrecked the economy and took away all their opportunities.
7. Emily Ratajkowski is for them, not us. She's not on a pedestal, she's positively reachable. For all those oldsters who say they don't want to waste time on social media, social media is today's game, not radio and SoundScan and all the metrics of yore.
8. You can't wait and contemplate, you've got to play. Risk is anathema to oldsters, it's everything to youngsters.
9. You might not be able to meet Emily Ratajkowski, but she can certainly inspire you, teach you how to live your life. Yes, more kids are now going to reveal their boobies and dance freely. You cannot put this genie back into the bottle.
10. Look behind the facade. "American Idol" and "X Factor" and "The Voice" are not about singing or careers, they're about television and advertising. If you're bitching about them, you're missing the point. The point is it's more fun to be a star yourself than to listen to the whored out performers. Yes, musicians are rarely heroes, but they do provide the grease for your lifestyle. Hell, you can't dance without the tunes!
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