I'm stunned at the amount of love out there for this band.
The problem with writing about old music is those who remember do, and those who don't don't care. It's a well-known fact that the Beatles and Zeppelin have survived, that Black Sabbath and the Doors have gotten an unforeseen renaissance, but so many of the old hit bands have faded into the woodwork, and I don't think they're going to radiate. But for those of us who were there...they inhabit a sacred place inside us, where we store all our memories, triggered by the sounds.
ANGRY EYES
From the second LP, the one with the unexpected hit, "Your Mama Don't Dance." But as obvious a cut as that was, almost lowest common denominator, the album ended with this seven minute and forty second opus that has survived amongst fans longer than the hit, it was even an FM staple, all because of the PLAYING!
That's right, the first minute and a half was a regular song, but then there began an extended instrumental passage, akin to the fourth side of "Fillmore East," i.e. "Whipping Post." And as heretical as that might sound today, back then music was a big tent, you could like everything and be proud of said fact. Actually, we're returning to that era, today's youngsters like hip-hop and pop and EDM and...just check the Spotify Top 50.
So, your mind is set free to drift and you're nodding your head, this is a perfect marijuana song, if you partook of said substance, which was illegal, but widely available, and then... At the 6:45 mark the band lights up and the vocals come back in and...it truly is like that last moment of "Whipping Post."
A tour de force.
LONG TAIL CAT
Just an album cut on the second LP, but it's so endearing, so intimate, so heartfelt, from back before anybody could sing, before Auto-Tune. When being able to write and play were not only badges of honor, they were nearly a prerequisite to making it.
A Kenny Loggins song without wimpiness, back when we were all wearing hiking boots at the height of the Back To The Land movement. This played well in the cabin, by the fire. Or maybe you were picking your guitar on the porch in the snow, like Stephen Stills...
WHISKEY
Actually, they spell it without the "e," it's WHISKY!
Did you see that article in today's WSJ about daters evaluating prospects on spelling and grammar?
"What's Really Hot on Dating Sites? Proper Grammar": http://on.wsj.com/1N6Fskf
But most people had no idea of the true moniker back before the internet.
But one thing's for sure, you don't do ANYTHING mellow at the Whisky anymore. I was driving by last night and the headliner was Trixter. Really? They're still together? Makes me feel sad that these bands still slog it out and don't give up and do something else. Then again, you're bagging groceries at Safeway, you're practicing law and someone realizes who you are...that'd be hard to handle.
PATHWAY TO GLORY
From the third album, "Full Sail," which was a return to form. Ultimately there was a hit single, "A Love Song," but this is the best cut on the LP, another intimate Messina number. You'll get it.
SAILIN' THE WIND
You can hear the sailboat noises at the beginning, the spars, the ocean sounds, if you've ever been on the water, even on the dock, you'll recognize them.
Another extended opus, "Sailin' The Wind," is mellower than "Angry Eyes" and not quite as good, but just as satisfying in another way.
We used to get bored, we used to be reflective. You'd put this on and lie on your couch and view the waning day and think about what once was and what still might be.
I love it.
TRILOGY: LOVIN' ME/TO MAKE A WOMAN FEEL WANTED/PEACE OF MIND
From the spring '74 live album "On Stage."
I didn't buy it.
Remember this was back when we had bigger eyes than wallets, we could not afford everything, so different from today. Back when every hit group went on a double live album victory lap after a few hits. And then there was the reverse, most famously "Frampton Comes Alive," which followed four relatively unsuccessful studio LPs and ultimately graduated to monster success.
I'd hear this live album on the radio now and again, and I always liked it, but there were so many other records to buy, the seventies don't have a great rep, but that spring saw the release of Aerosmith's breakthrough "Get Your Wings" and Ry Cooder's "Paradise and Lunch"...and I was still listening to Wendy Waldman's debut from Christmas '73, as well as Joni's huge "Court and Spark" and...
MOTHER LODE
And then comes the piece-de-resistance, the album with no hit singles, that I love best.
You see I was couchsurfing. We didn't call it that back then, but that's what it was. From apartment to apartment in West L.A. While I killed time before I left town to start my job at the Goldminer's Daughter in Alta, Utah.
Only a strange thing happened a week before I was supposed to leave.
I broke my leg in a freak ski accident.
A long story. Driving to Big Bear in the push-button Valiant of a German national the car's transmission caught fire on the way up the hill (which is long, winding and steep). A fire truck serendipitously came by and put out the flames but then we were standing in the middle of nowhere with no transportation. So what did we do? HITCHHIKE! And thinking no one would have a ski rack in early November, and that my 207 Dynamics wouldn't fit inside anybody's car, I took along the shorter shop skis which had bindings which would not hold and ten feet in the air, in the middle of a jump, one ski came off and I landed with one foot in the snow and the other foot on its ski and I twisted and tumbled and I didn't experience extreme pain but I knew something was wrong.
They had to carry the basket over dirt, I had x-rays, my fibula was broken. They set it and I rode back to town in the back of a VW bug, with the distressed extremity lying over two other people in the back seat.
Really.
And therefore I was in L.A. during Christmas, unexpectedly. So, jonesing for music I went with my sister to Licorice Pizza with my dad's credit card and purchased eight albums, one of which was Loggins & Messina's "Mother Lode."
And when my college buddy John Hughes showed up after losing his job on the Ford assembly line, there was a recession going on, he had his cassette deck with him and I taped each and every one of those albums and they were the soundtrack to my driving for the whole next year, to Utah and Mammoth and points beyond.
Like Ketchum, Idaho, otherwise known as Sun Valley.
I was on the interstate in a raging snowstorm. Yes, I had snow tires, I wasn't an idiot. Studded, actually. Driving through southern Idaho towards Twin Falls the cassette in the Blaupunkt was "Mother Lode" and it was so scary I couldn't risk scrounging for another tape to insert so I just listened to "Mother Lode" over and over and over again. Not only was it the soundtrack to that trip, it still is. I think of either the drive or the tunes and then I think of the other, they're intertwined.
Imagine yourself on a gray winter day, snow blowing sideways, in the middle of nowhere, no sun in sight, alone in your automobile, with no cellphone, no outside communication...
And then play this record.
CHANGES
My second favorite Loggins & Messina song at this point (number one is "Same Old Wine"), "Changes" is a tour de force with an indelible guitar sound, changes as fast and furious as any ride at Disneyland and the memorable couplet...
"Turn around there's Uncle Sam
He's got his hand down in your pants"
Some lines just stay with you, these are at the front of my brain. But they're part of a longer verse...
"You work yourself to death
So you can have a home
You put your money aside
To call it all your own
You finally save enough
And you're thinking you're gonna advance
Turn around there's Uncle Sam
He's got his hand down in your pants"
In the internet era, we romanticize the days of yore, the old record business.
But the truth is the old record business was a killer, this was long before Don Passman's book, acts were unsophisticated and regularly got ripped-off. And even if you were on the road, tickets were only a few bucks. The ten dollar ducat was years off.
Yes, being a rock star was hard...
"You give your life away
For what in return
A chance to see your name in lights
While you learn
Your manager he's home
And a-workin' away
To keep you on the road
And a-movin' from day to day"
BE FREE
This is another quiet Messina number.
All the pieces are here.
Incredible playing, listen to that mandolin in the left ear, yes, I'm listening on headphones. Great lyrics, changes and vocals.
"I want to get away and live my life
In the rivers and trees
I want to spend my days making wine
And be free, and be free, and be free"
Actually, I always thought it was "making RHYME," but all the lyric sites, even Spotify itself, say otherwise.
But what difference does it make?
I graduated from college and went on a two year journey of discovery. Skiing the world's best powder and getting the world's worst case of mononucleosis.
Nobody does that anymore. Not anybody who graduates from a good college. You've immediately got to start your career, money is most important.
But it wasn't back then. Developing yourself, experiencing life, those were paramount. And the music instructed you to do so. Who you were as opposed to what you owned was key. Sure, a nice car and a nice bod helped, but they weren't everything, we could see through those.
GET A HOLD
It starts around the bend, over the hill, and then comes into view.
Incredible guitar picking, never mind great horns.
Back when Kenny was still credible, great voice, and...
We were all trying to get a hold of ourselves, constantly.
When we weren't letting go.
KEEP ME IN MIND
Written by Messina, but sung by bass player Larry Sims. Imagine that! Sure, John & Paul let Ringo sing their compositions, but by the seventies, everybody was starting to look out for themselves, ultimately the coke exacerbated this, made everybody paranoid.
"Keep Me In Mind" is only three and a half minutes long, but it plays like one of the band's extended numbers, with a dreamy, yet nefarious solo section.
They don't make music like this anymore. It's seen as wimpy, we want in your face.
To our detriment.
SAME OLD WINE
In a brand new bottle.
It was 2005, Loggins & Messina had been broken up for decades. Kenny'd had his solo success, but then...
He was dead in the water, he turned once again to his old friend, they went on the road...
Five or seven years too late. All the seventies bands whose members were still alive had already reunited, new sounds had come in, this would have been a much bigger deal before Napster, before the internet destroyed the past.
But...
The shows were so satisfying!
This recording comes from the beginning of the tour, and it's good, but it was part of the promotion for the gigs, I'd love to hear a recording from deeper in the journey.
But having said that...
I saw the band at the Greek.
They came on when it was still light, usually anathema, the mystery, the ju-ju, is absent, and then they started to play...WHEW!
And sure, they played all the hits.
But it was the album cuts I came for, and they whipped out those too, like "Same Old Wine."
It's the same old wine in a different bottle.
Trump is no Ross Perot, but he gets even more press.
The Republicans keep telling us trickle-down economics will work.
The only difference is the musicians are on the wrong side, they're no longer leaders, just suck-ups to the corporations. Free-thinking? HOW AM I GONNA GET RICH!
That's what everybody wants to know, how they can become wealthy, as if they're entitled, as if that's life's highest purpose.
But we baby boomers who lived through the era know...
That's not the case.
You might drive a BMW, you might live in a five thousand square foot house, dine at the finest establishments, drink $100 wine, but you still remember when... We were all in together, rich was not a billion, not even a million, and no one you knew had it, when there weren't even any scalpers, who'd pay that price, when you went to school to learn, as opposed to get a job.
That's what it was like back then.
And I'd say the music rode shotgun, but the truth is the players were our leaders, religious icons.
They wore street clothes on stage, playing well was more important than looking good, and they could say no... They weren't begging, but delivering.
As did Loggins & Messina in their not quite ten year reign.
And like I said up top, I doubt I'm gonna make any converts here.
Kenny's got a lightweight image and Messina's been all but forgotten and having had hits the band is not hip but...
GOOD FRIEND
"I had a good friend sometime ago
We had a good thing and we let it show
Oh, I was a fool, I let him go
Oh oh oh, how I miss him so"
I miss the old days.
Oh, don't get me wrong, I love the internet, my mobile phone, it's the greatest antidote to depression and loneliness ever invented, even better than Prozac.
But I remember when music was king, when you couldn't get a ticket to the show, when we had to go to communicate with the band, to make our lives complete as opposed to a badge of honor.
Forget the charts, they're irrelevant.
As was AM back in the day.
Music was in the hands of the people, that's where it lived. It was as important as water and power, the first thing you did when you moved was set up the stereo, and believe me you had one, with as good a set of components as you could afford. Forget the death of record stores, how about the death of stereo stores!
Music was my good friend.
Actually, it still is.
And I like some of the new stuff. But it's not quite coming from the same place. You see, music used to be part of the revolution, it was us against them.
And we were winning.
We're losing now.
But you never know, the good times could come back.
I certainly hope so!
Spotify link: http://spoti.fi/1VtLOhV
______________________________________________
Dear Bob,
Thank you for your kind mention and generous observations.
I would enjoy sending you (if you wish) an album I recorded entitled JIM MESSINA "Live" at the Clark Center for the Performing Arts. I am in the process of mixing another Live album I just recorded at the Lobero Theater in Santa Barbara.
These days… for me… it's more about performing live in small theaters and small performing art centers. An intimate evening at an venue where my audience can come to listen to the music I've created over the years, sit back and enjoy a glass of wine at a reasonable volume level,and be out of a concert no later than 9p or 10p is the name of the game. It works for me!
In fact…I just did that last night myself. My wife and I hired a baby sitter for my 9 year old daughter Josey and went to see the "Time Jumpers." They, in combination with Vince Gill, are one phenomenal group of musicians and singers! If you have never seen them live… you are in for a real surprise.
Again, my deepest appreciation and kindest regards,
Jim Messina
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Friday 2 October 2015
Rhinofy-Sittin' In
Jim Messina was a secondary character in a troubled band and then a majordomo in an also-ran band and Kenny Loggins was a complete unknown but when they were put together, it was magic.
Yes, Messina was in Buffalo Springfield. A classic band whose frontmen, Stephen Stills, Neil Young and Richie Furay, got all the attention.
And then he was in Poco, whose first album was a classic without a hit single, a cult favorite that could not break through to mainstream status. The follow-ups weren't as good, the Eagles came along and usurped the fans of that band and then Messina quit to become a producer. And working with Kenny Loggins...they decided to work together. Kenny added pop to Jim's sound and Jim prevented Kenny from becoming too saccharine and...
NOBODY BUT YOU
You have to know, these songs were not on the radio. Adoption was driven by the press. Messina was a known quantity and reviews were good and then you bought the album and dropped the needle on this initial cut and...WOW!
And singles could not mean less in '71, when this LP came out, but a catchy song always helps ignite a career.
You could spin this and everybody would instantly fall into the groove, back when we all sat around the dorm room and grooved with music in the background.
DANNY'S SONG
This wasn't a hit either, even though it feels like one. But you're conflating the original with the Anne Murray cover.
Now this was back before we had any idea who Kenny Loggins was, we thought he was just another singer/songwriter in a long tradition which now owned the airwaves, James Taylor and Carole King were...kings.
This is so intimate, the same personalization we got with "Tea For The Tillerman" the spring before. Maybe even Elton's "Sixty Years On" the year before. Imagine getting someone's attention by being quiet! So different from today's in your face paradigm. You leaned in to listen. But one should not underestimate the power of Al Garth's violin in the break.
"Pisces, Virgo rising is a very good sign"
I think astrology is b.s., but I know this line and sing along because...IT JUST FEELS RIGHT!
"Danny's Song" is just as powerful today as it was upon release, if you've never heard it before it's a REVELATION!
VAHEVALA
This was before reggae had broken through, before "Yeah mon" was an expression in the mainstream.
"Catch A Fire" didn't come out until '73, the Wailers didn't mean much in the U.S. until the end of the seventies, "I Can See Clearly Now" was still half a year away.
So...don't see "Vahevala" as ersatz, rather it was TRAILBLAZING!
Jimmy Buffett's island-flavored hits were years away.
And although purists can claim that "Vahevala" doesn't sound like Jamaica, merely references it, this was nearly cutting edge back in '71...AND IT SOUNDED SO GOOD!
And at the four minute mark, when you hit the instrumental, you're taken on a satisfying aural journey that enraptures you and when the track ends...you're left high and dry, you want nothing so much as to play it again!
TRILOGY: LOVIN' ME/TO MAKE A WOMAN FEEL WANTED/PEACE OF MIND
Eleven plus minutes and no wasted notes, it satisfies for its entire length.
This is the kind of music that cemented the reputation of album rock. I've heard this on Sirius XM's Deep Tracks, but never on the FM of yore. It was too long, it wasn't a hit, stations were tightening up their playlists, but..."Trilogy" is now my second favorite song the album. It too is a revelation.
BACK TO GEORGIA
The best part is the piano intro and the guitar pickin'.
This is a bit lightweight, foreshadowing where Kenny Loggins ultimately went, but there's a great pre-chorus and if today's albums had any tracks as good as this one...music would be in a different place.
HOUSE AT POOH CORNER
This was not a hit. It only made it to number 53.
So, don't see it as an overplayed lullaby... Rather it hearkened back to our youth and we dug that. Hard to blame a track for your perception of it as a result of its winnowing its way into the culture through no fault of its own. The truth is listeners loved it so much that they employed it as a baby song when they started having those, in the eighties, millennials all heard this, on record or sung to them, they probably still remember it.
Now I must note there was a previous iteration by the Nitty Gritty Dirt Band on their 1970 album "Uncle Charlie & His Dog Teddy," proving that people don't really go from obscurity to fame instantly... Kenny Loggins had been working it.
LISTEN TO A COUNTRY SONG
Written by Al Garth and Jim Messina and sung by Jim this was close to Poco and it ultimately went to number four on the country chart when country was a different animal. I like it, but I don't love it.
SAME OLD WINE
Eight plus minutes long, it's my favorite number on the LP.
Written and sung by Messina, it's subtle. But it gets under your skin.
Isn't that the power of music?
You can get your lips inflated, pump up your boobs and ass and you'll get a lot of looky-loos, but we're enthralled most by those who subtly lead with their personality and identity. Like "Same Old Wine."
And the lyrics reference disillusionment with the political regime and religion, and the words give the song power, but not as much as the playing. Intertwine the two and you've got a magic elixir.
I don't know if you can slow down enough to pay attention to this, but back in '71 we had a lot of time on our hands. There was no internet, no mobile phones, only three network television stations, we spent a lot of time sitting in front of the stereo, digesting the tunes. Stuff like this.
ROCK 'N' ROLL MOOD
The final track, and it sounds like it.
It's more about feel than hooks. It's like they're closing the door on the LP, having said all they have to.
It's about mood, the song is reflective. Remember when we looked back, with more questions than answers? Back before everybody was a winner?
"Sittin' In" was the soundtrack to that.
Spotify link: http://spoti.fi/1GiPW88
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Yes, Messina was in Buffalo Springfield. A classic band whose frontmen, Stephen Stills, Neil Young and Richie Furay, got all the attention.
And then he was in Poco, whose first album was a classic without a hit single, a cult favorite that could not break through to mainstream status. The follow-ups weren't as good, the Eagles came along and usurped the fans of that band and then Messina quit to become a producer. And working with Kenny Loggins...they decided to work together. Kenny added pop to Jim's sound and Jim prevented Kenny from becoming too saccharine and...
NOBODY BUT YOU
You have to know, these songs were not on the radio. Adoption was driven by the press. Messina was a known quantity and reviews were good and then you bought the album and dropped the needle on this initial cut and...WOW!
And singles could not mean less in '71, when this LP came out, but a catchy song always helps ignite a career.
You could spin this and everybody would instantly fall into the groove, back when we all sat around the dorm room and grooved with music in the background.
DANNY'S SONG
This wasn't a hit either, even though it feels like one. But you're conflating the original with the Anne Murray cover.
Now this was back before we had any idea who Kenny Loggins was, we thought he was just another singer/songwriter in a long tradition which now owned the airwaves, James Taylor and Carole King were...kings.
This is so intimate, the same personalization we got with "Tea For The Tillerman" the spring before. Maybe even Elton's "Sixty Years On" the year before. Imagine getting someone's attention by being quiet! So different from today's in your face paradigm. You leaned in to listen. But one should not underestimate the power of Al Garth's violin in the break.
"Pisces, Virgo rising is a very good sign"
I think astrology is b.s., but I know this line and sing along because...IT JUST FEELS RIGHT!
"Danny's Song" is just as powerful today as it was upon release, if you've never heard it before it's a REVELATION!
VAHEVALA
This was before reggae had broken through, before "Yeah mon" was an expression in the mainstream.
"Catch A Fire" didn't come out until '73, the Wailers didn't mean much in the U.S. until the end of the seventies, "I Can See Clearly Now" was still half a year away.
So...don't see "Vahevala" as ersatz, rather it was TRAILBLAZING!
Jimmy Buffett's island-flavored hits were years away.
And although purists can claim that "Vahevala" doesn't sound like Jamaica, merely references it, this was nearly cutting edge back in '71...AND IT SOUNDED SO GOOD!
And at the four minute mark, when you hit the instrumental, you're taken on a satisfying aural journey that enraptures you and when the track ends...you're left high and dry, you want nothing so much as to play it again!
TRILOGY: LOVIN' ME/TO MAKE A WOMAN FEEL WANTED/PEACE OF MIND
Eleven plus minutes and no wasted notes, it satisfies for its entire length.
This is the kind of music that cemented the reputation of album rock. I've heard this on Sirius XM's Deep Tracks, but never on the FM of yore. It was too long, it wasn't a hit, stations were tightening up their playlists, but..."Trilogy" is now my second favorite song the album. It too is a revelation.
BACK TO GEORGIA
The best part is the piano intro and the guitar pickin'.
This is a bit lightweight, foreshadowing where Kenny Loggins ultimately went, but there's a great pre-chorus and if today's albums had any tracks as good as this one...music would be in a different place.
HOUSE AT POOH CORNER
This was not a hit. It only made it to number 53.
So, don't see it as an overplayed lullaby... Rather it hearkened back to our youth and we dug that. Hard to blame a track for your perception of it as a result of its winnowing its way into the culture through no fault of its own. The truth is listeners loved it so much that they employed it as a baby song when they started having those, in the eighties, millennials all heard this, on record or sung to them, they probably still remember it.
Now I must note there was a previous iteration by the Nitty Gritty Dirt Band on their 1970 album "Uncle Charlie & His Dog Teddy," proving that people don't really go from obscurity to fame instantly... Kenny Loggins had been working it.
LISTEN TO A COUNTRY SONG
Written by Al Garth and Jim Messina and sung by Jim this was close to Poco and it ultimately went to number four on the country chart when country was a different animal. I like it, but I don't love it.
SAME OLD WINE
Eight plus minutes long, it's my favorite number on the LP.
Written and sung by Messina, it's subtle. But it gets under your skin.
Isn't that the power of music?
You can get your lips inflated, pump up your boobs and ass and you'll get a lot of looky-loos, but we're enthralled most by those who subtly lead with their personality and identity. Like "Same Old Wine."
And the lyrics reference disillusionment with the political regime and religion, and the words give the song power, but not as much as the playing. Intertwine the two and you've got a magic elixir.
I don't know if you can slow down enough to pay attention to this, but back in '71 we had a lot of time on our hands. There was no internet, no mobile phones, only three network television stations, we spent a lot of time sitting in front of the stereo, digesting the tunes. Stuff like this.
ROCK 'N' ROLL MOOD
The final track, and it sounds like it.
It's more about feel than hooks. It's like they're closing the door on the LP, having said all they have to.
It's about mood, the song is reflective. Remember when we looked back, with more questions than answers? Back before everybody was a winner?
"Sittin' In" was the soundtrack to that.
Spotify link: http://spoti.fi/1GiPW88
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Thursday 1 October 2015
Jimmy Iovine
Three strikes and you're out.
Farmclub, Beats Music and now Apple Music. And while we're at it, Jimmy bears some responsibility for the failed Pressplay, and that's four strikes.
Not that Jimmy Iovine is not talented. It's just that his talent lies in the field of...TALENT RELATIONS!
Jimmy's all about sucking you into his orbit, making you feel good, and utilizing your talent to generate bucks.
But what about Beats headphones?
It wasn't a technology play, Monster provided the product, Jimmy provided the marketing.
So what's a guy like this doing at Apple?
Good question.
So Jimmy starts off in the studio. Works his way up from the bottom to be an engineer and then a producer. He sidles up to the talent and gets the gig. The resulting albums were hits, and one cannot argue with success, I tip my hat to Jimmy for these records.
And then came Interscope. A failure until Jimmy facilitated the move of Dr. Dre from Ruthless to Death Row. Jerry Heller will tell you Dre was signed to an exclusive contract. Suge Knight was the author of "Winning Through Intimidation." In any event, Dre's hits went through Interscope and Jimmy became a king. We can argue all day what Jimmy provided and what methods he employed and how much credit he deserves, but music is an ugly business where everybody's hands are dirty so to criticize Jimmy...you'd have to criticize everybody else too.
And then came the 9/11 "Tribute To Heroes," Jimmy's finest moment. Sure he stacked the show with colleagues and Interscope artists, the telecast made the barely known Enrique Iglesias a star, but this was the last hurrah of the old music business. Music mattered. It still drove the culture. We all sat at home while planes were grounded and watched, a show that was on seemingly every channel.
And then it all went to hell.
Research Jimmy's quotes. He was the last person who wanted to blow up the institution. His were rearguard comments..
And then came the Beats headphone success.
What sold Beats?
COOL! All those stars, both musical and athletic. Everybody wanted to be like Dre and LeBron. Meanwhile, every headphone site known to man said the sound sucked. But it made no difference, Jimmy was selling fashion, not technology.
But Jimmy viewed himself a technology king. So he bought MOG and started Beats Music.
A complete failure. A better interface than Apple Music, since it was sans MP3s, but it had no freemium element. There was a brief free trial, but despite the vaunted telco hookup and the usual parade of stars the public didn't want Beats Music. Because it was a me-too product with no free tier when YouTube was completely free and Spotify had freemium.
And then Jimmy sold the whole shebang to Apple.
Why they need a crappy line of headphones, I don't know. Hell, they've already had to recall some for electrical glitches, that's how well they're built...
But they got the guts of a streaming service and Jimmy himself.
Now there's a long history of Apple buying established products to aid in the creation of something new. SoundJam MP was the basis of iTunes.
And I don't know exactly who to blame for the writing of the abomination known as the Apple Music app. But one thing's for sure, Jimmy Iovine is lost at Apple. He's not even as good as Guy Kawasaki, the famous evangelist. At least Guy could talk.
Jimmy can't code.
He can't present.
And his vision is not in tech.
First we had the U2 disaster. ANYBODY who surfs the web and utilizes devices could see this coming. Why couldn't Jimmy?
Because he's an insider in an outside world. Music is all about manipulation, shaving edges the public can't see. Like placement and position, muscling gatekeepers for exposure. The public has no idea how the sausage is made.
But tech is transparent. 1's and 0's. And it's driven by consumers. With everything available online, with comparison shopping easily done, with reviews at your fingertips, it's hard to pull the wool over people's eyes. There used to be regional hits in the record business, those went away with the internet, we all live in the same world now, and there are a few winners and a bunch of losers and you win via excellence.
Apple Music is not excellent.
Jimmy went to the labels and asked for a discount, he wanted Apple Music priced at $7.99.
They said no. Jimmy had lost his insider leverage, at least when it came to dough, the bottom line.
But Jimmy could wrangle talent. But getting an exclusive on Drake and Future's new album is old school, it pisses off more people than it pleases, in tech you win on infrastructure, not penumbra.
So what has Jimmy Iovine achieved?
Well, he got really damn rich. But he put Tim Cook in a pickle. With the U2 fiasco and now the Apple Music disaster. Jimmy was supposed to be the savior, but he's hurt Apple more than he's helped it.
Come on, Connect? ANYBODY who used the web knew it was superfluous, unneeded, furthermore Jimmy couldn't even convince the acts to use it!
Tech is not about perception, but reality. Perception was Apple was gonna deliver a killer music service. Reality is it fumbled the ball. Ask Jimmy about trying to get a radio station to play a second or third single off a superstar's album after the first one stiffed. VERY difficult!
The reason tech has eaten Hollywood's lunch for the past fifteen years is because tech is willing to start with a clean slate knowing the customer is king. In entertainment, it's all about protecting the legacy players, the retailers, the exhibitors, and the inside deal rules. It's all about windows and distribution games whereas in tech you put it out and let the public decide, usually without even any advertising! Imagine a new Hollywood film without a marketing budget. Then you've got the launch of Google, Facebook, Snapchat... They sold on quality, not image.
Apple took the image hit for its new music service, not Jimmy.
But someone's got to pay.
Volkswagen circumvents the emission standards and Martin Winterkorn resigns, you've got to wipe out the dead wood, you've got to get a fresh start.
Same deal has to happen at Apple. Jimmy's got to go. Or at least be demoted. Called a "consultant." Hell, Will Dana lost his job at "Rolling Stone" after the UVA fiasco, you've got to send a message to people that failure won't be tolerated.
But Jimmy's gonna be gone soon anyway. There's no place for him at Apple. He's a smoke and mirrors guy in a world where that doesn't play. He's a street hustler in a world run by nerdy geeks. He needs to go back to developing talent, with its rough edges, the artistic world cannot be digitized.
Or he can just take his money and go home.
But he Peter principled himself right out of relevance. He proved that he was not the man he told us he was. He could not save the music business single-handedly, better curation was not the silver bullet the public was looking for.
The public is looking for ease of use first and foremost. That's how you get people to pay, through convenience. That's how Spotify killed P2P to begin with.
And subscriptions soar based on talent, hit records are an incredible driver...
But the streaming service is just the pipe.
Jimmy was charged with building a better pipe.
But his leaked. Sure, it worked, but poorly.
Time to call a new plumber.
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Farmclub, Beats Music and now Apple Music. And while we're at it, Jimmy bears some responsibility for the failed Pressplay, and that's four strikes.
Not that Jimmy Iovine is not talented. It's just that his talent lies in the field of...TALENT RELATIONS!
Jimmy's all about sucking you into his orbit, making you feel good, and utilizing your talent to generate bucks.
But what about Beats headphones?
It wasn't a technology play, Monster provided the product, Jimmy provided the marketing.
So what's a guy like this doing at Apple?
Good question.
So Jimmy starts off in the studio. Works his way up from the bottom to be an engineer and then a producer. He sidles up to the talent and gets the gig. The resulting albums were hits, and one cannot argue with success, I tip my hat to Jimmy for these records.
And then came Interscope. A failure until Jimmy facilitated the move of Dr. Dre from Ruthless to Death Row. Jerry Heller will tell you Dre was signed to an exclusive contract. Suge Knight was the author of "Winning Through Intimidation." In any event, Dre's hits went through Interscope and Jimmy became a king. We can argue all day what Jimmy provided and what methods he employed and how much credit he deserves, but music is an ugly business where everybody's hands are dirty so to criticize Jimmy...you'd have to criticize everybody else too.
And then came the 9/11 "Tribute To Heroes," Jimmy's finest moment. Sure he stacked the show with colleagues and Interscope artists, the telecast made the barely known Enrique Iglesias a star, but this was the last hurrah of the old music business. Music mattered. It still drove the culture. We all sat at home while planes were grounded and watched, a show that was on seemingly every channel.
And then it all went to hell.
Research Jimmy's quotes. He was the last person who wanted to blow up the institution. His were rearguard comments..
And then came the Beats headphone success.
What sold Beats?
COOL! All those stars, both musical and athletic. Everybody wanted to be like Dre and LeBron. Meanwhile, every headphone site known to man said the sound sucked. But it made no difference, Jimmy was selling fashion, not technology.
But Jimmy viewed himself a technology king. So he bought MOG and started Beats Music.
A complete failure. A better interface than Apple Music, since it was sans MP3s, but it had no freemium element. There was a brief free trial, but despite the vaunted telco hookup and the usual parade of stars the public didn't want Beats Music. Because it was a me-too product with no free tier when YouTube was completely free and Spotify had freemium.
And then Jimmy sold the whole shebang to Apple.
Why they need a crappy line of headphones, I don't know. Hell, they've already had to recall some for electrical glitches, that's how well they're built...
But they got the guts of a streaming service and Jimmy himself.
Now there's a long history of Apple buying established products to aid in the creation of something new. SoundJam MP was the basis of iTunes.
And I don't know exactly who to blame for the writing of the abomination known as the Apple Music app. But one thing's for sure, Jimmy Iovine is lost at Apple. He's not even as good as Guy Kawasaki, the famous evangelist. At least Guy could talk.
Jimmy can't code.
He can't present.
And his vision is not in tech.
First we had the U2 disaster. ANYBODY who surfs the web and utilizes devices could see this coming. Why couldn't Jimmy?
Because he's an insider in an outside world. Music is all about manipulation, shaving edges the public can't see. Like placement and position, muscling gatekeepers for exposure. The public has no idea how the sausage is made.
But tech is transparent. 1's and 0's. And it's driven by consumers. With everything available online, with comparison shopping easily done, with reviews at your fingertips, it's hard to pull the wool over people's eyes. There used to be regional hits in the record business, those went away with the internet, we all live in the same world now, and there are a few winners and a bunch of losers and you win via excellence.
Apple Music is not excellent.
Jimmy went to the labels and asked for a discount, he wanted Apple Music priced at $7.99.
They said no. Jimmy had lost his insider leverage, at least when it came to dough, the bottom line.
But Jimmy could wrangle talent. But getting an exclusive on Drake and Future's new album is old school, it pisses off more people than it pleases, in tech you win on infrastructure, not penumbra.
So what has Jimmy Iovine achieved?
Well, he got really damn rich. But he put Tim Cook in a pickle. With the U2 fiasco and now the Apple Music disaster. Jimmy was supposed to be the savior, but he's hurt Apple more than he's helped it.
Come on, Connect? ANYBODY who used the web knew it was superfluous, unneeded, furthermore Jimmy couldn't even convince the acts to use it!
Tech is not about perception, but reality. Perception was Apple was gonna deliver a killer music service. Reality is it fumbled the ball. Ask Jimmy about trying to get a radio station to play a second or third single off a superstar's album after the first one stiffed. VERY difficult!
The reason tech has eaten Hollywood's lunch for the past fifteen years is because tech is willing to start with a clean slate knowing the customer is king. In entertainment, it's all about protecting the legacy players, the retailers, the exhibitors, and the inside deal rules. It's all about windows and distribution games whereas in tech you put it out and let the public decide, usually without even any advertising! Imagine a new Hollywood film without a marketing budget. Then you've got the launch of Google, Facebook, Snapchat... They sold on quality, not image.
Apple took the image hit for its new music service, not Jimmy.
But someone's got to pay.
Volkswagen circumvents the emission standards and Martin Winterkorn resigns, you've got to wipe out the dead wood, you've got to get a fresh start.
Same deal has to happen at Apple. Jimmy's got to go. Or at least be demoted. Called a "consultant." Hell, Will Dana lost his job at "Rolling Stone" after the UVA fiasco, you've got to send a message to people that failure won't be tolerated.
But Jimmy's gonna be gone soon anyway. There's no place for him at Apple. He's a smoke and mirrors guy in a world where that doesn't play. He's a street hustler in a world run by nerdy geeks. He needs to go back to developing talent, with its rough edges, the artistic world cannot be digitized.
Or he can just take his money and go home.
But he Peter principled himself right out of relevance. He proved that he was not the man he told us he was. He could not save the music business single-handedly, better curation was not the silver bullet the public was looking for.
The public is looking for ease of use first and foremost. That's how you get people to pay, through convenience. That's how Spotify killed P2P to begin with.
And subscriptions soar based on talent, hit records are an incredible driver...
But the streaming service is just the pipe.
Jimmy was charged with building a better pipe.
But his leaked. Sure, it worked, but poorly.
Time to call a new plumber.
--
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--
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--
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Apple Music Trial Period Ends
They're not gonna tell us how many subscribers they've got.
And they're not gonna extend the free period, the rightsholders won't let them.
So what have we learned here...
Apple launched a beta product.
How could they get it so wrong? They have public betas of iOS 9 and El Capitan and they throw this half-baked software at the public?
They were afraid of being late.
But the truth is it's still early.
And an opportunity was blown.
YouTube owns music streaming.
Spotify owns paid music streaming.
But most people are not paying.
Will they pay Google/YouTube, Spotify or Apple?
I DON'T KNOW!
But I do know that there is a first mover advantage, but if you're not first, you'd better get it right. That was the essence of the iPod.
But not Apple Music.
Tesla was not the first electric car, just the best. The only people you can get to say anything negative about Tesla are right wingers invested in fossil fuels and the "Wall Street Journal" editorial page which carps about federal subsidies. But the public LOVES Tesla. What broke Tesla through? The "Consumer Reports" ratings. Best ever. The "New York Times" tried to quibble with that, a snarky writer said the car did not have the range promised and...ELON MUSK WENT NUCLEAR ON HIM! Just like Steve Jobs used to. Needless to say, Tim Cook is not going nuclear on me, because I'm right and he's wrong. And that's a sorry state of affairs.
Tesla won because their cars just worked, and unlike their competitors' automobiles they had RANGE! Over 200 miles, and that made a difference. And Tesla went after the early adopters with money, who love to spread the word. Instead of launching a cutting edge music service, Apple was so busy trying to involve the rearguard that they ended up with a platform that pleased nobody. Apple Music ain't good for streaming and it ain't good for files. Pick a lane.
If Tesla ran its operation like Apple Music every car would come with a gasoline engine, kind of like a Volt. But the Volt failed because... People don't trust General Motors, I'd never buy one of their cars. AND the Volt had substandard electric range. So the Volt was adopted by wonks, it just wasn't cool enough, it failed in the marketplace, they had to give the initial iteration away at the end of its life cycle, whereas Tesla's Model S still has customers.
But forget Tesla, what about social networks?
Yes, you drive Teslas in the real world. Apple Music is an internet product.
Do you know ANYBODY who uses Connect?
Talk about a ghostland...
How could they get it so wrong?
It's so hard to start anything these days, there's so much noise that you've got to double-down, be innovative, entice people. That's Snapchat. Connect is an antiquated concept that is not only unnecessary, the acts didn't adopt it and neither did the listeners.
So now Apple puts out how-to videos.
Did you catch that story?
Probably not. Because, once again, there are too many stories out there, and Apple Music's window in our frontal lobes has passed. Would it have been that hard to have how-to clips upon launch? It'd be like launching the Mac without a manual, no one knew how to use it! And no one knows how to use Apple Music, which is even less intuitive than the 128k Mac. Who blew it here? Who didn't realize the product was hard to use? Who skated on developing help videos?
I'm not sure, but I do know it's too late.
The ninety days are up.
I'm not paying.
Apple could reach out and give me a free account, but that's not their style. But that's what you do when you've got a developing enterprise. And you endure the hate as well as hope for the love. Spotify works better for me. If Apple Music improves...how am I gonna know?
First impressions count. How are you gonna get all those people back to Apple Music? The ones who signed off today, and the ones who'll sign off in a month when they're surprised by the bill?
Only through free, my friend.
That's what's funny... Apple didn't want to pay the acts for the trial period and now, if they're smart, they'll pay them for a freemium tier.
But, as stated above, the rightsholders don't want this.
Because the rightsholders are greedy, unlike tech companies they can't wait for riches.
Even the vaunted Google had no monetization plan upon launch.
But it's even worse... Because music blew it. Still selling CDs and then files it didn't see streaming coming. It blew a hole in its revenue plan and now it wants the public to just jump up and pay?
FAHGETTABOUDIT!
Even worse is the book publishers. Kindle copies now cost more than paperbacks in some cases. Everybody knows that a file is cheaper for the publisher, there's no printing, no shipping, no returns. But the publishers and writers want to preserve their old model, not realizing that it's dying and there's more money in getting everybody to play at a reduced rate. The cell phone companies realized this, it's not a mystery.
But not as many people read books as listen to music.
But the music customer is pissed too. He has to hear again and again the bitching of acts when the truth is fans give their favorites so much money, overpaying for concert tickets and merch... A successful act is making more money than any other time in the history of the music business, albeit less from recordings, and the customer is struggling to make rent. Telling people to pay for a second-rate service or be bounced back to YouTube... Let my Apple Music subscription lapse.
But the last chapter has not been written on streaming music. If for no other reason than most people are not subscribing. There's a lot of runway. Which means...
Apple's still got a chance. Hell, there are tons of people who never signed up for the ninety day trial!
But Spotify is friendlier, both in terms of usability and payment. There are more options.
So, the advantage goes to Spotify...
Apple used to act like a startup.
Now it's an ocean liner with too many hands and they can't seem to turn it around.
Tell me two music business people winning in music tech.
I CAN'T EVEN NAME ONE!
In other words, it was a huge mistake to hand the reins of Apple Music to Jimmy Iovine and Trent Reznor...they just don't get it. Their mind-set is inured to the past.
Or, to quote the Firesign Theatre, HOW CAN YOU BE IN TWO PLACES AT ONCE WHEN YOU'RE NOT ANYWHERE AT ALL?
That's Apple Music. A lot of press, but very little action. Another Cupertino failure.
Not hard to believe when you lose your visionary, someone unafraid to make the hard calls.
John Lennon was an asshole. He wasn't about getting along, but getting it right.
They need more of that spirit at Apple.
Until that time...
I'm gonna use my Mac and my iPhone but I see no reason to own a Watch, I returned mine because it did the one key thing lousily, and that's tell time.
And Apple Music does the one key thing lousily too...
And that's play music.
All the curation, all the b.s...
Just let me play my tunes.
And give me comprehensible playlists.
Even better, give me a comprehensible interface.
One free month as a Christmas gift... Apple's loaded, they've got to find a way to get trial subscribers to come back, it's their only hope.
But they've got to fix the product first.
Fisker failed. Looked just as cool as a Tesla, but it broke down.
Let that be a lesson to you.
Looks are for Kardashians.
But we want soul.
Failed technology went out with the twenty first century. We expect everything to work right out of the box, and if it doesn't we abandon it.
I've abandoned Apple Music.
And I'm not the only one.
People with the Watch can't stop raving about it!
But there aren't that many of them.
And there won't be many Apple Music subscribers either.
And I wonder if anybody's smart enough in Cupertino to make it right.
I'd start by firing Jimmy Iovine...
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And they're not gonna extend the free period, the rightsholders won't let them.
So what have we learned here...
Apple launched a beta product.
How could they get it so wrong? They have public betas of iOS 9 and El Capitan and they throw this half-baked software at the public?
They were afraid of being late.
But the truth is it's still early.
And an opportunity was blown.
YouTube owns music streaming.
Spotify owns paid music streaming.
But most people are not paying.
Will they pay Google/YouTube, Spotify or Apple?
I DON'T KNOW!
But I do know that there is a first mover advantage, but if you're not first, you'd better get it right. That was the essence of the iPod.
But not Apple Music.
Tesla was not the first electric car, just the best. The only people you can get to say anything negative about Tesla are right wingers invested in fossil fuels and the "Wall Street Journal" editorial page which carps about federal subsidies. But the public LOVES Tesla. What broke Tesla through? The "Consumer Reports" ratings. Best ever. The "New York Times" tried to quibble with that, a snarky writer said the car did not have the range promised and...ELON MUSK WENT NUCLEAR ON HIM! Just like Steve Jobs used to. Needless to say, Tim Cook is not going nuclear on me, because I'm right and he's wrong. And that's a sorry state of affairs.
Tesla won because their cars just worked, and unlike their competitors' automobiles they had RANGE! Over 200 miles, and that made a difference. And Tesla went after the early adopters with money, who love to spread the word. Instead of launching a cutting edge music service, Apple was so busy trying to involve the rearguard that they ended up with a platform that pleased nobody. Apple Music ain't good for streaming and it ain't good for files. Pick a lane.
If Tesla ran its operation like Apple Music every car would come with a gasoline engine, kind of like a Volt. But the Volt failed because... People don't trust General Motors, I'd never buy one of their cars. AND the Volt had substandard electric range. So the Volt was adopted by wonks, it just wasn't cool enough, it failed in the marketplace, they had to give the initial iteration away at the end of its life cycle, whereas Tesla's Model S still has customers.
But forget Tesla, what about social networks?
Yes, you drive Teslas in the real world. Apple Music is an internet product.
Do you know ANYBODY who uses Connect?
Talk about a ghostland...
How could they get it so wrong?
It's so hard to start anything these days, there's so much noise that you've got to double-down, be innovative, entice people. That's Snapchat. Connect is an antiquated concept that is not only unnecessary, the acts didn't adopt it and neither did the listeners.
So now Apple puts out how-to videos.
Did you catch that story?
Probably not. Because, once again, there are too many stories out there, and Apple Music's window in our frontal lobes has passed. Would it have been that hard to have how-to clips upon launch? It'd be like launching the Mac without a manual, no one knew how to use it! And no one knows how to use Apple Music, which is even less intuitive than the 128k Mac. Who blew it here? Who didn't realize the product was hard to use? Who skated on developing help videos?
I'm not sure, but I do know it's too late.
The ninety days are up.
I'm not paying.
Apple could reach out and give me a free account, but that's not their style. But that's what you do when you've got a developing enterprise. And you endure the hate as well as hope for the love. Spotify works better for me. If Apple Music improves...how am I gonna know?
First impressions count. How are you gonna get all those people back to Apple Music? The ones who signed off today, and the ones who'll sign off in a month when they're surprised by the bill?
Only through free, my friend.
That's what's funny... Apple didn't want to pay the acts for the trial period and now, if they're smart, they'll pay them for a freemium tier.
But, as stated above, the rightsholders don't want this.
Because the rightsholders are greedy, unlike tech companies they can't wait for riches.
Even the vaunted Google had no monetization plan upon launch.
But it's even worse... Because music blew it. Still selling CDs and then files it didn't see streaming coming. It blew a hole in its revenue plan and now it wants the public to just jump up and pay?
FAHGETTABOUDIT!
Even worse is the book publishers. Kindle copies now cost more than paperbacks in some cases. Everybody knows that a file is cheaper for the publisher, there's no printing, no shipping, no returns. But the publishers and writers want to preserve their old model, not realizing that it's dying and there's more money in getting everybody to play at a reduced rate. The cell phone companies realized this, it's not a mystery.
But not as many people read books as listen to music.
But the music customer is pissed too. He has to hear again and again the bitching of acts when the truth is fans give their favorites so much money, overpaying for concert tickets and merch... A successful act is making more money than any other time in the history of the music business, albeit less from recordings, and the customer is struggling to make rent. Telling people to pay for a second-rate service or be bounced back to YouTube... Let my Apple Music subscription lapse.
But the last chapter has not been written on streaming music. If for no other reason than most people are not subscribing. There's a lot of runway. Which means...
Apple's still got a chance. Hell, there are tons of people who never signed up for the ninety day trial!
But Spotify is friendlier, both in terms of usability and payment. There are more options.
So, the advantage goes to Spotify...
Apple used to act like a startup.
Now it's an ocean liner with too many hands and they can't seem to turn it around.
Tell me two music business people winning in music tech.
I CAN'T EVEN NAME ONE!
In other words, it was a huge mistake to hand the reins of Apple Music to Jimmy Iovine and Trent Reznor...they just don't get it. Their mind-set is inured to the past.
Or, to quote the Firesign Theatre, HOW CAN YOU BE IN TWO PLACES AT ONCE WHEN YOU'RE NOT ANYWHERE AT ALL?
That's Apple Music. A lot of press, but very little action. Another Cupertino failure.
Not hard to believe when you lose your visionary, someone unafraid to make the hard calls.
John Lennon was an asshole. He wasn't about getting along, but getting it right.
They need more of that spirit at Apple.
Until that time...
I'm gonna use my Mac and my iPhone but I see no reason to own a Watch, I returned mine because it did the one key thing lousily, and that's tell time.
And Apple Music does the one key thing lousily too...
And that's play music.
All the curation, all the b.s...
Just let me play my tunes.
And give me comprehensible playlists.
Even better, give me a comprehensible interface.
One free month as a Christmas gift... Apple's loaded, they've got to find a way to get trial subscribers to come back, it's their only hope.
But they've got to fix the product first.
Fisker failed. Looked just as cool as a Tesla, but it broke down.
Let that be a lesson to you.
Looks are for Kardashians.
But we want soul.
Failed technology went out with the twenty first century. We expect everything to work right out of the box, and if it doesn't we abandon it.
I've abandoned Apple Music.
And I'm not the only one.
People with the Watch can't stop raving about it!
But there aren't that many of them.
And there won't be many Apple Music subscribers either.
And I wonder if anybody's smart enough in Cupertino to make it right.
I'd start by firing Jimmy Iovine...
--
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--
http://www.twitter.com/lefsetz
--
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Wednesday 30 September 2015
John Oliver vs. Lorne Michaels
Who has the best farm team, Lorne Michaels or Jon Stewart?
The latter is retired, but he spawned Stephen Colbert and John Oliver.
Who has Lorne hatched for us lately?
NOBODY!
But Lorne controls the media, he's the King of New York!
But there's a new emperor in town.
Welcome to 2015 where there's so much noise even excellence can't rise above. John Oliver is doing a show so good, so now, that all you can do is watch and marvel. It's a weird combination of irreverence and truth, of the seemingly off the cuff and the researched. Whereas SNL is the same tired formula.
But every week we've got to hear who's on SNL, as if we care.
Then again, the hosts and musical acts use it as a promotional vehicle, everybody's selling, everybody's looking for notice. It's like the Girl Scouts are knocking on your door looking for money every damn Saturday.
And what do we know about SNL? We're going to get broad pokes at politics and public tropes. Lorne is right, it's tough times for SNL because there are few national reference points. Therefore, I ask, why do the same show?
But that's America. Everybody repeats himself until someone steals the thunder.
Kind of like musical acts, insisting on making albums, promoting them not only on SNL, but in scorched earth media campaigns, believing if you just yell loud enough people will care.
But they don't.
But what I can't fathom is why John Oliver's "Last Week Tonight" is not bigger. SNL launched in 1975 and it was part of the national discussion within a month. John Oliver's been on HBO for over a year and he still does not have mainstream traction. What is going on?
Well, it's a different universe. When SNL launched, there were three networks.
Now there are a zillion outlets.
Meaning, that in 1975, pre-cable, John Oliver wouldn't have even gotten a show. Jon Stewart either. It was all about playing it safe, the edges were cut off. Which is why the original SNL was so revolutionary. It was a clubhouse where limits could be tested, the hijinks spoke to a generation. SNL is speaking to Nielsen and advertisers today, young people don't watch and oldsters DVR it and barely screen it. As for me, I stopped even looking up the clips on YouTube, they're not funny.
But John Oliver is.
John Oliver reinvented the paradigm. Lorne is about skewering that which we all know about. But the problem is most of us don't know much. Which is why Oliver educates us. He's got a running gag poking fun at our ignorance, where he puts a country up on the map and then ultimately says that's not where it's located. We're Americans, we can barely find Kansas. That's right, John Oliver is insulting his own audience. You can't do that on SNL, it's a big tent trying to include everyone. But by being so cool, and such a nerd, Oliver appears an original and we just want to get closer.
Oliver just doesn't play Volkswagen for laughs, he shows clips of continued idiocy. "Last Week Tonight" is a well-researched show. Facts are almost as important as delivery/writing. That ain't SNL.
But the media never writes about Oliver, at least in comparison to SNL.
In the old days, you could start outside and triumph seemingly overnight, when word spread. Today, word spreads so slowly that you start outside and stay there. And I defy you to watch last week's Oliver episode and find flaws. He's at the top of his game, he's delivering something we haven't seen previously, yet he's plying his wares in the wilderness.
Well, not completely. There are the HBO viewers/subscribers. And also those on YouTube.
How can musicians get it so wrong and a comedian get it so right? How can labels have their heads up their rear ends but HBO be so au courant?
That's right, HBO is selling subscriptions, but you can see John Oliver for free on YouTube, every episode. Because HBO knows your enemy is not piracy, but obscurity. There's plenty of money if someone knows who you are. But that's a huge hill to climb, you've got to give it away to entice people, since you're competing against so much other content, and you've got to be better than everybody else.
A tall order, I know.
But what I do know is this...
1. Age and experience count. We want 'em ever younger and malleable in music, but John Oliver is old and experienced with a viewpoint and that's why he's so great. Max Martin has paid his dues, most of the people he works with have not.
2. There's excellent and everything else. If you're not better than everybody else, don't even start. The ascent will be so gradual as to frustrate you. Not everybody can be an entertainment icon. If you're just good, get better or give up.
3. No one's got any time. They don't even have time to find John Oliver, and he's PHENOMENAL! Don't ask for anybody's time. Just be so great that word of mouth spreads. If there's no word of mouth, go back to the drawing board.
4. The road is long, and heavy, even if you're being carried by your brother. Jon Stewart gave John Oliver a head start, but Oliver is still struggling. Oh, Oliver is delivering for his fans, but he hasn't become a national icon, and he should be. Used to be, one hit and you'd made it. George Carlin with his "Seven Dirty Words." Oliver has a bunch of catchphrases, but they haven't spread beyond acolytes of the show.
5. Old forms die. If you're invested in them, watch out. You're here to be replaced, people want something new. Abandon the past and enter the future. Don't compromise your vision.
6. Artists need no interference. HBO lets you go. If you can't test limits, you're not gonna do your best work. The A&R man might be able to tell you what's not a hit, but he can't tell you how to break the mold and be completely different, and he doesn't want to invest the money, time and effort to help you do so. In other words, you're alone. But the conundrum is you can't complete the effort alone, you need help. So, you start it and then sign up with a label. If John Oliver can't be bigger than SNL with all the help of HBO, you're not gonna do it independently.
7. Is this the new reality? Is almost nothing ubiquitous? We thrive when we've got common meat we can tear apart and discuss. That's what we love about Donald Trump, we all know who he is and politics are important. But in music, we've got Taylor Swift and maybe Kanye. And neither of their records are known by everybody. And then there's everybody else. Should you just be happy being everybody else? Society doesn't like this, society likes cohesion. But, if the best TV comedian in the business isn't garnering the most mindshare, what hope is there for you?
I don't know.
"Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Migrants and Refugees": http://bit.ly/1MUn2Tu
"Last Week Tonight with John Oliver - Volkswagen Car": http://bit.ly/1P6bLzb
P.S. If you view this VW clip you'll see Oliver poking fun at Lenny Kravitz for being the has-been he is and selling out to Volkswagen. That's right, while you were out beating the bushes for sponsorship money, screaming that you just can't get rich without it, these corporations have literally been killing people with impunity. Yes, VW diesel pollution killed people. Isn't it best to be on the side of the public, mostly obeying the law, as opposed to these lawless multinationals? Art used to stand separate, speak truth to power...and you wonder why music is culturally bankrupt.
P.P.S. Oliver is more innovative and more consistently great than Jimmy Fallon. But the media has anointed Fallon. We don't need another host behind a desk talking to inane guests... There are no guests on Oliver's show. He's blown up the paradigm. And someone's gonna come along and do the same in music.
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The latter is retired, but he spawned Stephen Colbert and John Oliver.
Who has Lorne hatched for us lately?
NOBODY!
But Lorne controls the media, he's the King of New York!
But there's a new emperor in town.
Welcome to 2015 where there's so much noise even excellence can't rise above. John Oliver is doing a show so good, so now, that all you can do is watch and marvel. It's a weird combination of irreverence and truth, of the seemingly off the cuff and the researched. Whereas SNL is the same tired formula.
But every week we've got to hear who's on SNL, as if we care.
Then again, the hosts and musical acts use it as a promotional vehicle, everybody's selling, everybody's looking for notice. It's like the Girl Scouts are knocking on your door looking for money every damn Saturday.
And what do we know about SNL? We're going to get broad pokes at politics and public tropes. Lorne is right, it's tough times for SNL because there are few national reference points. Therefore, I ask, why do the same show?
But that's America. Everybody repeats himself until someone steals the thunder.
Kind of like musical acts, insisting on making albums, promoting them not only on SNL, but in scorched earth media campaigns, believing if you just yell loud enough people will care.
But they don't.
But what I can't fathom is why John Oliver's "Last Week Tonight" is not bigger. SNL launched in 1975 and it was part of the national discussion within a month. John Oliver's been on HBO for over a year and he still does not have mainstream traction. What is going on?
Well, it's a different universe. When SNL launched, there were three networks.
Now there are a zillion outlets.
Meaning, that in 1975, pre-cable, John Oliver wouldn't have even gotten a show. Jon Stewart either. It was all about playing it safe, the edges were cut off. Which is why the original SNL was so revolutionary. It was a clubhouse where limits could be tested, the hijinks spoke to a generation. SNL is speaking to Nielsen and advertisers today, young people don't watch and oldsters DVR it and barely screen it. As for me, I stopped even looking up the clips on YouTube, they're not funny.
But John Oliver is.
John Oliver reinvented the paradigm. Lorne is about skewering that which we all know about. But the problem is most of us don't know much. Which is why Oliver educates us. He's got a running gag poking fun at our ignorance, where he puts a country up on the map and then ultimately says that's not where it's located. We're Americans, we can barely find Kansas. That's right, John Oliver is insulting his own audience. You can't do that on SNL, it's a big tent trying to include everyone. But by being so cool, and such a nerd, Oliver appears an original and we just want to get closer.
Oliver just doesn't play Volkswagen for laughs, he shows clips of continued idiocy. "Last Week Tonight" is a well-researched show. Facts are almost as important as delivery/writing. That ain't SNL.
But the media never writes about Oliver, at least in comparison to SNL.
In the old days, you could start outside and triumph seemingly overnight, when word spread. Today, word spreads so slowly that you start outside and stay there. And I defy you to watch last week's Oliver episode and find flaws. He's at the top of his game, he's delivering something we haven't seen previously, yet he's plying his wares in the wilderness.
Well, not completely. There are the HBO viewers/subscribers. And also those on YouTube.
How can musicians get it so wrong and a comedian get it so right? How can labels have their heads up their rear ends but HBO be so au courant?
That's right, HBO is selling subscriptions, but you can see John Oliver for free on YouTube, every episode. Because HBO knows your enemy is not piracy, but obscurity. There's plenty of money if someone knows who you are. But that's a huge hill to climb, you've got to give it away to entice people, since you're competing against so much other content, and you've got to be better than everybody else.
A tall order, I know.
But what I do know is this...
1. Age and experience count. We want 'em ever younger and malleable in music, but John Oliver is old and experienced with a viewpoint and that's why he's so great. Max Martin has paid his dues, most of the people he works with have not.
2. There's excellent and everything else. If you're not better than everybody else, don't even start. The ascent will be so gradual as to frustrate you. Not everybody can be an entertainment icon. If you're just good, get better or give up.
3. No one's got any time. They don't even have time to find John Oliver, and he's PHENOMENAL! Don't ask for anybody's time. Just be so great that word of mouth spreads. If there's no word of mouth, go back to the drawing board.
4. The road is long, and heavy, even if you're being carried by your brother. Jon Stewart gave John Oliver a head start, but Oliver is still struggling. Oh, Oliver is delivering for his fans, but he hasn't become a national icon, and he should be. Used to be, one hit and you'd made it. George Carlin with his "Seven Dirty Words." Oliver has a bunch of catchphrases, but they haven't spread beyond acolytes of the show.
5. Old forms die. If you're invested in them, watch out. You're here to be replaced, people want something new. Abandon the past and enter the future. Don't compromise your vision.
6. Artists need no interference. HBO lets you go. If you can't test limits, you're not gonna do your best work. The A&R man might be able to tell you what's not a hit, but he can't tell you how to break the mold and be completely different, and he doesn't want to invest the money, time and effort to help you do so. In other words, you're alone. But the conundrum is you can't complete the effort alone, you need help. So, you start it and then sign up with a label. If John Oliver can't be bigger than SNL with all the help of HBO, you're not gonna do it independently.
7. Is this the new reality? Is almost nothing ubiquitous? We thrive when we've got common meat we can tear apart and discuss. That's what we love about Donald Trump, we all know who he is and politics are important. But in music, we've got Taylor Swift and maybe Kanye. And neither of their records are known by everybody. And then there's everybody else. Should you just be happy being everybody else? Society doesn't like this, society likes cohesion. But, if the best TV comedian in the business isn't garnering the most mindshare, what hope is there for you?
I don't know.
"Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Migrants and Refugees": http://bit.ly/1MUn2Tu
"Last Week Tonight with John Oliver - Volkswagen Car": http://bit.ly/1P6bLzb
P.S. If you view this VW clip you'll see Oliver poking fun at Lenny Kravitz for being the has-been he is and selling out to Volkswagen. That's right, while you were out beating the bushes for sponsorship money, screaming that you just can't get rich without it, these corporations have literally been killing people with impunity. Yes, VW diesel pollution killed people. Isn't it best to be on the side of the public, mostly obeying the law, as opposed to these lawless multinationals? Art used to stand separate, speak truth to power...and you wonder why music is culturally bankrupt.
P.P.S. Oliver is more innovative and more consistently great than Jimmy Fallon. But the media has anointed Fallon. We don't need another host behind a desk talking to inane guests... There are no guests on Oliver's show. He's blown up the paradigm. And someone's gonna come along and do the same in music.
--
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--
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--
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Monday 28 September 2015
The Sisario Article
"Hip-Hop and R&B Fans Embrace Streaming Services: http://nyti.ms/1Vn3ExN
Read this. It's the most important information about the music business online today. Which means that you'll probably never see it, you're probably still reeling from that faux article in the "Tennessean" saying that the co-writer of "All About That Bass" only made $5,679 from streaming:
"'All About That Bass' writer decries streaming revenue": http://tnne.ws/1JpsUfV
That article's wrong, Kevin Kadish was misquoted, that's the PANDORA number! And for those not paying attention, which seems to be just about everybody, the rate for radio and for choose your own songs on Spotify are completely different...
But the song remains the same. You're gonna get paid on listens, and if you ain't got none...
The sales paradigm is history. In 24 months it'll be de minimis, inconsequential. And when we go to the streaming metrics a whole bunch of artists are gonna get a whole lot poorer, and the readers of this newsletter who are attached to the ancient paradigm of yore are gonna tear their hair out.
You know, rock bands who write their own material and release it as one long album...
KAPUT!
Actually, that formula got murdered by disco, after it got long in the tooth as corporate rock.
But then MTV rescued the rock business until hair bands softened the sound, made us all queasy, and it became all about hip-hop and pop.
And that's where we are today.
I'm not saying you can't make your old music in the old way, I'm just saying don't expect anybody to listen to it, don't expect to get rich.
We're in the middle of the great transition.
The baby boomers are about to emit their last gasp. Everybody but the titans has already been eliminated. Unless you're running the operation, you're gone.
And there are some Gen X'ers with power, mostly in the live sphere, but we're getting ready to skip generations and hand the baton to the millennials, who have no allegiance to classic rock, radio or the rest of the b.s. we hold so near and dear.
As for Sisario postulating that hip-hop is being driven by Beats 1, that's ridiculous, Beats 1 is part of the old game, the only difference is that it's international. Radio is a second-class enterprise because you can't hear what you want when you want, it's not on demand, it'd be like being limited to one television network and having to endure the commercials, you'd freak if you'd experienced today's zillion channel universe. Hell, Apple eviscerates ads on the hand-set and Beats 1 is trying to jet us back to the last century? Who's driving this bus?
Certainly not the people streaming podcasts via Bluetooth in their automobiles.
First they came for the CDs.
Then they came for the cable.
Don't be married to the old carrier, be married to content. And the truth is these hip-hop and R&B acts are speaking the truth, and the popsters create catchier music than the old farts with their guitars. And never forget the Beatles were catchy, the Stones too. You start with the hit, everything else comes thereafter.
Furthermore, Sisario is casting a wide net, hip-hop is one thing, R&B another. This is not marginal music, you know that if you listen to the Weeknd. But it is the sound of today.
Does it frequently have boasting lyrics with no interior monologue, no reveal of inner thoughts and demons?
Yes, and that's sad. Once upon a time music was integral to our lives because of its soothing quality, the songs understood us in a way nothing else did.
But that was back before money became God and the educated middle class left music behind. Believe me, interior monologue is coming back. But I can't tell you when.
But I will tell you that sales are now a meaningless metric. One can argue they always were. Because to be in someone's heart and mind you've got to be listened to. And today, you only get paid if someone listens. That should be the target of your campaign, to get people to listen. And one song is enough, you build on that. In other words, one hit is worth much more than ten GOOD tracks. A hit drives listeners to check out more.
It starts as a singles business.
And the competition is fierce.
And despite the vocality of the old farts, the power resides in the youngsters, because they are the ones streaming the tunes. They're not just talking, they're listening.
And the kids don't care about history. They're just like you were back when when you were addicted to the radio, when you were addicted to MTV, you were drawn to the hit. Made by people parading their fame all over the universe.
And in an era of chaos, that which breaks through sustains. Expect number one to last longer, at least on the streaming chart, which is the only one that counts. And tracks go slow, like Fetty Wap's, or fast, like Bieber's. Fame will gain you notice but you've got to deliver. If you're starting out, it's a long hard slog.
So, so long not only record stores, but discs of all kinds. You love vinyl, great, I know some Civil War re-enactors you might want to talk to.
So long meaningless sales reports in the media. They're gonna switch completely to streaming as soon as "Billboard" does, which will be a step too late, but is in the offing.
So long front-loading your publicity. If you can't get people to listen over time, if your album has got no legs, you're better off not putting it out. People know whether it's a dud in a day. And no one is fooled by your scorched earth publicity campaign, they're actually turned-off! The hip-hop and R&B stars lead with days worth of advance publicity, if they employ any at all!
How could they get it so right?
Because they're in touch with the street, and they know that if you're not busy being born...
You're busy dying.
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Read this. It's the most important information about the music business online today. Which means that you'll probably never see it, you're probably still reeling from that faux article in the "Tennessean" saying that the co-writer of "All About That Bass" only made $5,679 from streaming:
"'All About That Bass' writer decries streaming revenue": http://tnne.ws/1JpsUfV
That article's wrong, Kevin Kadish was misquoted, that's the PANDORA number! And for those not paying attention, which seems to be just about everybody, the rate for radio and for choose your own songs on Spotify are completely different...
But the song remains the same. You're gonna get paid on listens, and if you ain't got none...
The sales paradigm is history. In 24 months it'll be de minimis, inconsequential. And when we go to the streaming metrics a whole bunch of artists are gonna get a whole lot poorer, and the readers of this newsletter who are attached to the ancient paradigm of yore are gonna tear their hair out.
You know, rock bands who write their own material and release it as one long album...
KAPUT!
Actually, that formula got murdered by disco, after it got long in the tooth as corporate rock.
But then MTV rescued the rock business until hair bands softened the sound, made us all queasy, and it became all about hip-hop and pop.
And that's where we are today.
I'm not saying you can't make your old music in the old way, I'm just saying don't expect anybody to listen to it, don't expect to get rich.
We're in the middle of the great transition.
The baby boomers are about to emit their last gasp. Everybody but the titans has already been eliminated. Unless you're running the operation, you're gone.
And there are some Gen X'ers with power, mostly in the live sphere, but we're getting ready to skip generations and hand the baton to the millennials, who have no allegiance to classic rock, radio or the rest of the b.s. we hold so near and dear.
As for Sisario postulating that hip-hop is being driven by Beats 1, that's ridiculous, Beats 1 is part of the old game, the only difference is that it's international. Radio is a second-class enterprise because you can't hear what you want when you want, it's not on demand, it'd be like being limited to one television network and having to endure the commercials, you'd freak if you'd experienced today's zillion channel universe. Hell, Apple eviscerates ads on the hand-set and Beats 1 is trying to jet us back to the last century? Who's driving this bus?
Certainly not the people streaming podcasts via Bluetooth in their automobiles.
First they came for the CDs.
Then they came for the cable.
Don't be married to the old carrier, be married to content. And the truth is these hip-hop and R&B acts are speaking the truth, and the popsters create catchier music than the old farts with their guitars. And never forget the Beatles were catchy, the Stones too. You start with the hit, everything else comes thereafter.
Furthermore, Sisario is casting a wide net, hip-hop is one thing, R&B another. This is not marginal music, you know that if you listen to the Weeknd. But it is the sound of today.
Does it frequently have boasting lyrics with no interior monologue, no reveal of inner thoughts and demons?
Yes, and that's sad. Once upon a time music was integral to our lives because of its soothing quality, the songs understood us in a way nothing else did.
But that was back before money became God and the educated middle class left music behind. Believe me, interior monologue is coming back. But I can't tell you when.
But I will tell you that sales are now a meaningless metric. One can argue they always were. Because to be in someone's heart and mind you've got to be listened to. And today, you only get paid if someone listens. That should be the target of your campaign, to get people to listen. And one song is enough, you build on that. In other words, one hit is worth much more than ten GOOD tracks. A hit drives listeners to check out more.
It starts as a singles business.
And the competition is fierce.
And despite the vocality of the old farts, the power resides in the youngsters, because they are the ones streaming the tunes. They're not just talking, they're listening.
And the kids don't care about history. They're just like you were back when when you were addicted to the radio, when you were addicted to MTV, you were drawn to the hit. Made by people parading their fame all over the universe.
And in an era of chaos, that which breaks through sustains. Expect number one to last longer, at least on the streaming chart, which is the only one that counts. And tracks go slow, like Fetty Wap's, or fast, like Bieber's. Fame will gain you notice but you've got to deliver. If you're starting out, it's a long hard slog.
So, so long not only record stores, but discs of all kinds. You love vinyl, great, I know some Civil War re-enactors you might want to talk to.
So long meaningless sales reports in the media. They're gonna switch completely to streaming as soon as "Billboard" does, which will be a step too late, but is in the offing.
So long front-loading your publicity. If you can't get people to listen over time, if your album has got no legs, you're better off not putting it out. People know whether it's a dud in a day. And no one is fooled by your scorched earth publicity campaign, they're actually turned-off! The hip-hop and R&B stars lead with days worth of advance publicity, if they employ any at all!
How could they get it so right?
Because they're in touch with the street, and they know that if you're not busy being born...
You're busy dying.
--
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--
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Jerry's Memorial
I wish I loved people as much as Jerry Weintraub.
Then Billy Crystal would do shtick about me, George Clooney would imitate me, Matt Damon would tell personal stories about me and Paul Anka would personalize the lyrics of "My Way" for me.
It's a long way to the top if you wanna rock and roll. And that's where Jerry began. Oh, he had traction before that, most famously with his wife Jane Morgan, but Elvis made him a legend. Led Zeppelin too. He promoted both and managed John Denver and ended up in the movie business and then died prematurely and what is left?
An incredible amount of good will.
People loved Jerry. He called Gerry Parsky every day at 6 AM and told him it was his friend on the line. Never mentioned his name. That's when you know someone, when no introduction is necessary. And we're all looking for someone we can count on in this world, who will be there for us, who will make things right...and I heard that story told over and over about Jerry tonight.
I'll be honest, I almost didn't go. How many people would I know? Irving and...
Well, Jerry Greenberg was there. And Joe Smith. And a lot of people you see on the screen who I recognized but wouldn't dare speak to. That's what happens when you're in between fame and famine... You don't speak with anyone you're not introduced to.
And I was introduced to the guy who owns Il Piccolino. He was so sad, he's having a hard time carrying on without the man with his own dish on the menu.
And Jeff Wald. Remember Helen Reddy's husband? He was intense and didn't want to know me but not only did his countenance befit the legend, I could tell why Helen had been successful...we all need an advocate.
A manager, an agent, we need someone to believe in us or we're not gonna make it.
And there's a very thin layer at the tippity-top, those who can get anybody on the phone and make everything happen, like Jerry Weintraub.
"What do you want?"
Household names were constantly asked that. He'd deliver your heart's desire. And you believed him.
Kind of like Matt Damon. They were out playing golf, Jerry, Matt and Matt's dad. And Matt's father was ribbing his son about failing to graduate from college. Jerry asked Matt where he went. I thought this was a set-up for a put-down, the uneducated like to piss on the Ivys. Instead, Jerry said he could arrange a diploma, if that's what Matt wanted. If not Harvard, how about Princeton?
Yes, Jerry had a sense of humor.
After all, he was Jewish. We Jews have been persecuted for 5,000 years. We deflect it, cope via jokes, throw our hands in the air and say WTF. You just laugh and carry on.
And keep talking.
That's another Jewish trait. Jews can hold up their end of a conversation. You may not want to hear what they have to say, but boy do they have material.
So if you come from little and have the gift of gab you can make it all the way to the top.
Jerry was George Bush's consigliere. The first. The one with credibility. Jane read a long missive from the ex-Pres. Who said much, but marveled that Jerry could deliver so many famous names, ones the Pres. had no pull with. Bush wanted that doctor from "E.R." to fly to a devastated town and Jerry got Clooney on the plane. Jerry delivered first run movies, whatever the Pres. wanted, he just had to decide.
And then there was that great story about the Presidential party, at Blue Heaven, Jerry's abode. Barbara Bush was seated at a table with Warren Beatty and a coterie of other famous Hollywood men. Jerry put his hands on Warren's shoulders and insisted he not work his magic on Barbara, that he keep his sword sheathed. Cracked Billy Crystal up.
Who completely cracked us up.
Billy was never cool, never hip. Had two moments of transcendent greatness, with "When Harry Met Sally" and "City Slickers," but thereafter was so busy playing nice that we couldn't believe him.
But we believed Billy Crystal tonight. It was like the Oscars, but he was playing to a room that got the jokes. Instead of playing to tens of millions, Billy was doing his act for a few hundred, and he killed. The best story was about going to the Lakers game, sitting on the floor during Showtime (and if you don't know what I'm talking about...you'll never survive in Hollywood). Billy saw Kirk Douglas approaching and Jerry told him there would be trouble, because Billy had taken his seat. Kirk complained. Billy was star-struck and tongue-tied. Jerry told Kirk that Billy was hotter and deserved the seat. And that settled that.
Fleet on his feet. Quick with a comeback. Some people are born with it.
Like the ability to get along.
Unlike me.
My social anxiety kicks in, I don't think I belong, I'm afraid of saying something dumb or something not at all. I get so uptight I don't go or I leave.
But I'm a secondary player here. I'm not Barry Diller or Les Moonves or Terry Semel. I'm not even Super Dave Osborne. But I know Paul Anka. He closed the show. Am I really gonna leave without talking to him?
So I wander to the front, evade the household names, I don't want to look like a looky-loo in search of his brush with greatness, and I introduce myself to Paul and he says...
I KNOW WHO YOU ARE!
And he insisted we take a picture and he started telling me about his latest venture, a hologram production, and I'm asking his connection to Jerry and he went all the way back to Irvin Feld.
The circus guy? From Ringling Brothers?
Yup, that's the guy. He ruled the arena circuit before Jerry. Paul started out with Irvin, doing one nighters. And they stayed together.
Loyalty. It's about all you've got in show business. Because you've got to count on someone to get the job done.
And it is show BUSINESS! Sure, talent is necessary, but it's not the only thing that gets you to the top, it's rarely even the most important thing! There's perseverance, and the ability to get along with people, and your team. Spearheaded by the one person who can always get it done.
Like Jerry Weintraub.
The king of relationships.
The king of favors.
There's no one he couldn't get on the phone, nothing he wouldn't do. And sure, he got paid, but he let the light shine upon others, and he gave back, the list of charities he supported was endless.
A man's man.
A citizen of the world. Filled with insight, which allowed him to triumph.
It's not what you know so much as how you put it all together.
Not that Jerry lacked information. It's amazing how the giants work the e-mail and phone for bits of gossip.
But it's not just gossip, it's people. Their fantasies and flaws. Figure out people and you can rule the world.
Jerry figured out everybody he came in contact with. And either they were a friend or a foe. You're either with me or against me. It's a jungle out there, I'll treat you right, but I expect to be treated right in return.
Jerry Weintraub treated so many people right, delivered so much, that a who's who of the entertainment business showed up to pay fealty, to watch Steven Soderbergh's movie, to listen to stories told by those who run the culture.
But the truth is Jerry ran the culture, he pulled the strings, the public barely knew him and soon he will be forgotten.
But not by those he propped up, put forward, presented, gave advice to.
Those people know that without Jerry there is no entertainment business.
Do what you do to the best of your ability. Try not to be someone you're not. Put one foot in front of another, unafraid to play the game.
And then if you're lucky someone like Jerry will notice.
Jerry noticed me.
And I still feel the halo upon me.
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Then Billy Crystal would do shtick about me, George Clooney would imitate me, Matt Damon would tell personal stories about me and Paul Anka would personalize the lyrics of "My Way" for me.
It's a long way to the top if you wanna rock and roll. And that's where Jerry began. Oh, he had traction before that, most famously with his wife Jane Morgan, but Elvis made him a legend. Led Zeppelin too. He promoted both and managed John Denver and ended up in the movie business and then died prematurely and what is left?
An incredible amount of good will.
People loved Jerry. He called Gerry Parsky every day at 6 AM and told him it was his friend on the line. Never mentioned his name. That's when you know someone, when no introduction is necessary. And we're all looking for someone we can count on in this world, who will be there for us, who will make things right...and I heard that story told over and over about Jerry tonight.
I'll be honest, I almost didn't go. How many people would I know? Irving and...
Well, Jerry Greenberg was there. And Joe Smith. And a lot of people you see on the screen who I recognized but wouldn't dare speak to. That's what happens when you're in between fame and famine... You don't speak with anyone you're not introduced to.
And I was introduced to the guy who owns Il Piccolino. He was so sad, he's having a hard time carrying on without the man with his own dish on the menu.
And Jeff Wald. Remember Helen Reddy's husband? He was intense and didn't want to know me but not only did his countenance befit the legend, I could tell why Helen had been successful...we all need an advocate.
A manager, an agent, we need someone to believe in us or we're not gonna make it.
And there's a very thin layer at the tippity-top, those who can get anybody on the phone and make everything happen, like Jerry Weintraub.
"What do you want?"
Household names were constantly asked that. He'd deliver your heart's desire. And you believed him.
Kind of like Matt Damon. They were out playing golf, Jerry, Matt and Matt's dad. And Matt's father was ribbing his son about failing to graduate from college. Jerry asked Matt where he went. I thought this was a set-up for a put-down, the uneducated like to piss on the Ivys. Instead, Jerry said he could arrange a diploma, if that's what Matt wanted. If not Harvard, how about Princeton?
Yes, Jerry had a sense of humor.
After all, he was Jewish. We Jews have been persecuted for 5,000 years. We deflect it, cope via jokes, throw our hands in the air and say WTF. You just laugh and carry on.
And keep talking.
That's another Jewish trait. Jews can hold up their end of a conversation. You may not want to hear what they have to say, but boy do they have material.
So if you come from little and have the gift of gab you can make it all the way to the top.
Jerry was George Bush's consigliere. The first. The one with credibility. Jane read a long missive from the ex-Pres. Who said much, but marveled that Jerry could deliver so many famous names, ones the Pres. had no pull with. Bush wanted that doctor from "E.R." to fly to a devastated town and Jerry got Clooney on the plane. Jerry delivered first run movies, whatever the Pres. wanted, he just had to decide.
And then there was that great story about the Presidential party, at Blue Heaven, Jerry's abode. Barbara Bush was seated at a table with Warren Beatty and a coterie of other famous Hollywood men. Jerry put his hands on Warren's shoulders and insisted he not work his magic on Barbara, that he keep his sword sheathed. Cracked Billy Crystal up.
Who completely cracked us up.
Billy was never cool, never hip. Had two moments of transcendent greatness, with "When Harry Met Sally" and "City Slickers," but thereafter was so busy playing nice that we couldn't believe him.
But we believed Billy Crystal tonight. It was like the Oscars, but he was playing to a room that got the jokes. Instead of playing to tens of millions, Billy was doing his act for a few hundred, and he killed. The best story was about going to the Lakers game, sitting on the floor during Showtime (and if you don't know what I'm talking about...you'll never survive in Hollywood). Billy saw Kirk Douglas approaching and Jerry told him there would be trouble, because Billy had taken his seat. Kirk complained. Billy was star-struck and tongue-tied. Jerry told Kirk that Billy was hotter and deserved the seat. And that settled that.
Fleet on his feet. Quick with a comeback. Some people are born with it.
Like the ability to get along.
Unlike me.
My social anxiety kicks in, I don't think I belong, I'm afraid of saying something dumb or something not at all. I get so uptight I don't go or I leave.
But I'm a secondary player here. I'm not Barry Diller or Les Moonves or Terry Semel. I'm not even Super Dave Osborne. But I know Paul Anka. He closed the show. Am I really gonna leave without talking to him?
So I wander to the front, evade the household names, I don't want to look like a looky-loo in search of his brush with greatness, and I introduce myself to Paul and he says...
I KNOW WHO YOU ARE!
And he insisted we take a picture and he started telling me about his latest venture, a hologram production, and I'm asking his connection to Jerry and he went all the way back to Irvin Feld.
The circus guy? From Ringling Brothers?
Yup, that's the guy. He ruled the arena circuit before Jerry. Paul started out with Irvin, doing one nighters. And they stayed together.
Loyalty. It's about all you've got in show business. Because you've got to count on someone to get the job done.
And it is show BUSINESS! Sure, talent is necessary, but it's not the only thing that gets you to the top, it's rarely even the most important thing! There's perseverance, and the ability to get along with people, and your team. Spearheaded by the one person who can always get it done.
Like Jerry Weintraub.
The king of relationships.
The king of favors.
There's no one he couldn't get on the phone, nothing he wouldn't do. And sure, he got paid, but he let the light shine upon others, and he gave back, the list of charities he supported was endless.
A man's man.
A citizen of the world. Filled with insight, which allowed him to triumph.
It's not what you know so much as how you put it all together.
Not that Jerry lacked information. It's amazing how the giants work the e-mail and phone for bits of gossip.
But it's not just gossip, it's people. Their fantasies and flaws. Figure out people and you can rule the world.
Jerry figured out everybody he came in contact with. And either they were a friend or a foe. You're either with me or against me. It's a jungle out there, I'll treat you right, but I expect to be treated right in return.
Jerry Weintraub treated so many people right, delivered so much, that a who's who of the entertainment business showed up to pay fealty, to watch Steven Soderbergh's movie, to listen to stories told by those who run the culture.
But the truth is Jerry ran the culture, he pulled the strings, the public barely knew him and soon he will be forgotten.
But not by those he propped up, put forward, presented, gave advice to.
Those people know that without Jerry there is no entertainment business.
Do what you do to the best of your ability. Try not to be someone you're not. Put one foot in front of another, unafraid to play the game.
And then if you're lucky someone like Jerry will notice.
Jerry noticed me.
And I still feel the halo upon me.
--
Visit the archive: http://lefsetz.com/wordpress/
--
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--
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