Minneapolis

It's cold here!

I could feel it in the gap between the jetway and the plane, the blast of not quite frigid air that told me I was not in California anymore.

What's interesting about the new connected world is that you can live anywhere. Once upon a time, if you weren't in L.A. or New York you were off the grid. The outskirts were a good place to raise children, but chances were you were never going to be anything more than a big fish in a small pond.

But those days are history. The Internet works everywhere. As does cable TV. You can be hip anywhere. As well as completely out of it in the metropolis. With the onslaught of information chances are some kid in his basement in the midwest is much more savvy than you are on the coast. Which is why Spotify can be started in Stockholm, where the broadband speeds dwarfed those in the United States. That's what we all desire these days, a fast connection. That's why you must upgrade from your iPhone 4 or 4s to a 5, for the LTE. It's like surfing at home. Well, a U.S. home.

And there are rich people everywhere. We're driving along the banks of the Mississippi (I know how to spell it because of the song!) and on the St. Paul side are manses so big and beautiful, that you contemplate moving.

Not that Minneapolis was ever backward. It was always hip.

But always cold.

But the one thing they don't tell you is that just as cold as it is in the winter, that's how hot it is in the summer!

And since the advent of global warming, it's not as cold as it used to be, but everything's relative.

And where did I learn about Minnesota?

College! Going to school with Dodd Cosgrove, whose father ran Jolly Green Giant, and the kids from Wayzata, they taught me how to pronounce it!

And "The Heartbreak Kid." Forget the remake, the initial Charles Grodin flick is incredible. The final scene is priceless, when he's in Minnesota, giving his spiel to the blue bloods, this Jewish sporting goods retailer... But the highlight is the beach scene, where Grodin lays his towel down amidst endless sand and suddenly feels a shadow... And he looks up and it's Cybill Shepherd saying "You're lying in my spot!" That's what all males are looking for, a female to say we're lying in their spot. For all the machismo, most men are weak. If you're waiting for the man to move first, you're gonna wait a very long time, if not forever. Want a date with a guy? CALL HIM!

Or text him or e-mail him or...

Wendy, that's my sister, is a Facebook addict. I asked how the population was over there. She said in the last year so many have dropped out. I'm about done with Twitter, because I post and get no reaction, it's too frustrating. As for Facebook, I only play with a fake name, looking up those I used to know.

And the colors! We don't get them in Los Angeles. Even Colorado is not the same thing. But Minneapolis is like the east coast, and I've hit it perfectly, at its peak, when the trees are blazing and the leaves are still on.

And we're driving across the bridge and Wendy laments that winter is coming. How does she know? The clouds! They're flat, not puffy. The long tunnel is beginning.

And we drove under the new Guthrie, with its cantilever over the roadway.

And we saw the bridge that fell... In a cannot do nation, it was inspiring to see the replacement. It's lit up at night. Thoroughfare as celebration. And there's a memorial to the fallen. I got out and looked at the blue columns, with a short bio for each of the deceased.

And I know David Byrne is railing about the Internet. And Thom Yorke has doubled down on his hatred of Spotify. And track sales are dropping, because of YouTube streaming, if nothing else. And once upon a time we bought records, then tapes, then CDs, then MP3s and now...everything is available at our fingertips. It used to be important to get an iPhone, now a Samsung Galaxy is good enough. The tech comes and goes.

But the people, the culture, the society, remain.

They know that in Minneapolis.

The I-35W Bridge On Memorial Day: http://bit.ly/GWQDve

35W Bridge Memorial: http://bit.ly/17yqgBK


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