E-Mail Of The Day+

From: Jim Steinman
Subject: Jimmy Iovine

I knew that Jimmy stole two big names for new bands from me, but I had forgotten one! Here it is! His first INTERSCOPE albums were a band called BAD FOR GOOD (my solo album) and NEVERLAND (my show from the 70's). He blatantly "ripped me off". But, revealingly, I was never bitter, even a bit "flattered". That's "Jimmy to a T"! He WAS Shelly Yakus' assistant, but was on the phone for 95% of all the sessions. Still remained that way for decades!

Favorite moments: "Steinman, you're obsessed with creating art! I'm obsessed with BUYING art!"

On Pat Benatar's LOVE IS A BATTLEFIELD video, at 3 AM, when we'd talk almost daily: "Steinman, quick turn on MTV! Pat Benatar's trying to dance! She can't even stand still in time."

I gotta million of those! On You Tube, if you find my acceptance speech that I taped for winning the SONG OF THE YEAR for "IT'S ALL COMING BACK TO ME NOW". I told my favorite Iovine story, even imitating him a lot! It's the "kid in Wisconsin story" and it was "profound" to me, for different reasons than what Jimmy said.

He started turning a console dial quickly left to right and back over and over again! I asked him why, & Jimmy said "That's just a gimmick thing I do on every song, just to trip out that kid in Wisconsin listening on headphones." To me that gimmick became profound because I was thrilled that I was involved in something that could be heard by millions on TV and radio, but ALSO could be so intimate as to "envelop" a kid in Wisconsin, listening on headphones in bed, one of the most intimate situations possible! But theatre has always been my greatest love, because, beyond all else, it was the ONE ART FORM where the "files" couldn't be pirated or stolen! AND STILL CAN'T!

Jim Steinman

(BTW, two of my greatest thrills concern death: HEAVEN CAN WAIT from BAT OUT OF HELL played at Steve's funeral; and Stanley Snadowsky, founder of THE BOTTOM LINE, died listening to BAT. Tragic, of course, but thrilling too.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRt6hkRXoFw (my BMI speech)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hf3fJCZg9w8 (the ASSASINS' SONG
from NEVERLAND 1977)

_________________________________________

From: Dean Torrence
Subject: Jan Berry

OMG, as usual you nailed it!

I was out of town last week so I didn't get to see any of this until this weekend

Reading your words gave me goose bumps and usually its a really really good record that does that
not the written word

I will send you something tomorrow that is all about Jan and a bunch of people that want the
Rock & Roll Hall of Fame to Honor Jan!

Anyway, got some catching up to do, so I need to sign off

Stuff coming your way tomorrow
_________________________________________

From: chris stein
Subject: Summer Means Fun

Jan & Dean's cover:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KiuXDV6Jii8

Bruce and Terry╒s (Terry Melcher and Bruce Johnston) original:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GAl8hzl8GBI

this song was the direct inspiration for the old Blondie track ╥In The Sun╙
the minor chord in the verse being the odd hook, to me anyway╔

keep kicking
Chris

_________________________________________

From: jerry seltz
Subject: Re: Rhinofy-Jan & Dean Primer

from the Jack Benny radio show, the running gag was the announcer at the train station: Anaheim, Azusa, and Cucaaaaamonga.

Jerry Seltzer

_________________________________________

From: Stillneed Dadayjob
Subject: grammy goof

Bob,

I know you have a low opinion of the grammys people, and as a grammys person, I couldn't agree more. ╩

Here's an anecdote that illustrates the creative bankruptcy:

You know they only give out 10 awards on the show, and that the other 70 something are giving out in a pre telecast ceremony, right? ╩Well the grammys people couldn't figure out a name for that pre telecast ceremony (after taking more than a year thinking), so the marketing geniuses spent a quarter million dollars on a naming company to come up with this clunker, which will be revealed at the big may trustees meeting:╩

"Grammy Premiere Ceremony."

Doesn't make sense, and the staff is mortified by it. ╩But it has "pre" in it and better yet, the decision makers can point to all the money they spent on the name, so it must be worthwhile.

If I could quit, I would, and would send this from a real address. ╩But at least I can bitch anonymously.╩

Peace,
J

_________________________________________

From: Wallace Collins

What if being talented & following your dream, your muse, leads to a life of near-poverty & reliance upon others - & never leads to success.

Went to see my old bandmate/songwriting partner, crazy pete doing his solo gig in a dive bar a/c the tappanzee last nite (there but for the grace of...).

Amazing music maker/singer/guitar player, & funny as hell patter between songs.. Such a waste of an amazing creative talent (now in his mid-50s, twice-divorced, & was living in his parents' basement until he ╩again found a woman w/ a job to support him)...

Just a lifestyle I foresaw, feared & avoided.

_________________________________________

Subject: Re: Music Problems

Please don't print my name.

If people are complaining, they're whiners, and lazy. ╩Especially in Nashville where it's fashionable to wait for something to happen, for someone else to bequeath you with riches and success. ╩

One of my acts will triple touring gross and triple album sales from zip code data extracted from Internet radio and digital track sales. ╩

If you're complaining, you're not hustling. ╩

- no name

_________________________________________

From: Kia Kamran, Esq
Subject: RE: Stop Breaking Rules

Please can I add to the list:

1) Don't have your "assistant" call me, and then GET YOU to get on the phone after I pick up ("hi let me get ____ for you") unless you have no arms and he/she needs to hold your phone to your f...ing ear, or your name is preceded by "Justice" or "Secretary of" (with a .Gov at the end of your email). ╩This especially applies to you "entertainment biz" douches whose assistants are not even on payroll but are unpaid interns that don╒t know any better than to work for you and your shi..y 'entertainment GROUP'. ╩Make your own goddam calls; you ain't that important or busy.

2) For f...╒s sake, have your goddam contact info at the bottom of all of your emails (even replies), especially if you write me some incoherent babble worded as if texted by a teenage schoolgirl (sh...y abbreviations, INexpliCabLe CaPS, no salutation, no sign off, etc. . . ), and you're requiring me to preface my response by correcting the wholly erroneous premise of your question that made us all slightly stupider. ╩Don't send me to look for your number elsewhere, GIVE IT TO MEEEEEEE.

3) If you╒re going to FAX me, first go knee yourself in the dick for still using a Fax machine in 2014, and please for the sake of Moses Ben Shoolkan Israel Shell Malkhoot Binbartam, don't motherf...ing call me to warn me first. ╩My faxes come to my EMAIL automatically; I don't need to drop everything and go turn some handle continuously on some wooden box to receive your sh...y fax in real time, or plug some wire into some hole and hold a speaker to my ear and go "klondike 542 come in" or some s... from a black-and-white movie. ╩Motherf...er just send the s.... DAMN.

4) Likewise, if you've ever called me just to CONFIRM I've received your aforementioned FAX (or email), please just punch yourself in the jugular repeatedly until you get trans-vaginal mesothelioma or some other horrid condition those sh..bag lawyers advertise on TV and s..t. ╩We're not playing badminton motherf...er, I don't need to stand there anticipating your shuttlecock. ╩That╒s right, I love using that word; f... you, Shuttlecock!

'nuff respect as always Lefsetz. ╩

Best,
Kia

_________________________________________

From: Wim Reijnen
Subject: RE: Stop Breaking Rules

Put all your questions in one mssg/mail. Don't continue to ask questions you can find by using Google.

To all reps of aspiring artists: stop sending out mssgs to play abroad if you don't even have let's say 1,000,000 plays on Youtube, 100,000 likes on Facebook or a few thousand followers on Twitter and play bars in your hometown.
How do you think we could sell tickets on the other side of the world when no one here knows you yet?

Just my 2 cents.
_________________________________________

From: Mitch Weissman
Subject: Re: Pat Monahan To Front Led Zeppelin

I hope Jimmy is listening, Bob. ╩I almost had he and Billy Squier unite for a record in the 80's. Jimmy and I were chatting in NY's China Club under the Beacon Theater in '89. ╩We had become friendly of late. ╩While discussing his next move, I commented on how "Wasting My Time" from Outrider reminded me of "Everybody Wants You," to which Jimmy said "That's what I based it on. ╩I love that song!"

So, I said "Let me call Billy." ╩We both lived in the area. We were very good friends and sometime collaborators. So I called him and said "Jimmy wants to talk to you." So over he comes, they sit and talk, and I leave them alone. ╩When I returned to the table an album project had been decided upon. ╩And we all enjoyed the rest of the evening together.

So what happens? ╩John Kalodner (Geffen) gets wind of the idea and promptly packages the 2 label mates together, resulting in a record that made Robert Plant bristle. ╩Coverdale/Page, a really great "Led Zeppelin" album.

Can only wonder what the Squier/Page that might have been.

Best,
Mitch

_________________________________________

From: Sheila Stuewe
Subject: RE: The Fat Girl Episode

"But utilize your wiles and you can get any man you want.

Just by being truthful, honest and open.

Those are the keys to our heart.

And after our heart comes our body."


What perfect world do you live in?

I am a funny, successful, honest to the core, overweight woman. I have many male friends who adore me. ╩But, going on a really date, well that's tough. My boss even reminded me the other day that statistically it is more likely that I will be a victim of a terrorist attack than I will be able to find a man that will marry me. What boss says that to a skinning girl?

It takes a lot of work as a fat woman to get a man to look at you...to look beyond the X that follows the dress size...to look farther than the one piece bathing suit...to look into your irrepressible sense of humor, your zest for riding roller coasters screaming and laughing as your drop a hundred feet traveling 120 miles per hour, your successful career, to see your home that is filled with photos of those that love you, to walk through your garden that is filled with imperfect flowers at various stages of blooming, to stand next to you and experience your love of music and going to concerts where you feel the edge of Tom Petty's spotlight on the rim of your wide smiling face.

Maybe that's why I go to concerts and sit up front. Old rockers -- those that are nice men -- like Tom and the Heartbreakers. They don't look at my dress size, instead they see that I know every word to almost every song they have ever written. ╩For two hours they see my smile, my bouncing on the balls of my feet. They hear me harmonize on the chorus of "Learning to Fly." They smile back at me. They reach down and hand me a pick, saying with that gesture that they appreciate you.

And for now I have so much else in my life (family, friends, career, published essays) that exudes love, that I don't need to be searching for more. This leads me to conclude that to avoid risking the averted eyes, the excuses from a pot-bellied middle age men with the vanishing remains of a full head of hair is the only ╩thing to do.

Sheila Grace Stuewe
A fat woman that is so much more than what meets the eye


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