I probably would have done the same thing...it's usually not worth fighting someone with very little to lose...the whole wounded tiger thing...fight your way up, not your way down.
If I were a dickhead billionaire sociopath like Trump I'd have done the opposite...but fuck Trump.
Happy New Year buddy,
Aron Gibson
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The simple and beautiful idea of "customer service" is almost completely gone in the U.S. , it's sad.
pschase
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I forwarded this to my wife, Bob, and if my son was old enough, I'd send it to him, too. Great, thought-provoking piece. Happy new year otherwise. ;) -E
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Lesson? Stay home on New Year's Eve and make beef fondue and a nice bottle of cab and light a fire. Avoid amateur night. 62 is old enough not to see anyone you don't love on New Years.
Thomas Geimer
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Report the douche. He was probably hung over . . . too much bourbon and coke (cocaine) the night before.
Or he was a tweeker. I have noticed that tweekers can make electronics go haywire. I actually have a rule about that after having seen it so many times. Do not let tweekers near the electronics!
The human electrical system circulates in a clockwise manner. Tweekers get their electrical system running backwards. Or as the Brits say, "anti-clockwise'.
Your chauffeur seems to have been exceedingly anti-clockwise.
Reporting him is the right thing to do so as to protect others from having to suffer as you were gracious enough to do.
Happy New Year Bob! Go forth in Peace!
Kieron Kevin McKindle
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Know that feeling. Sounds like your better instincts called for not escalating the situation.
Trying to decipher someone's mental status on the fly is difficult.
You know he knows where you live which can be a disadvantage if dealing with a true whack job.
Hmmm, maybe a John Wayne respond might have been more appropriate. I love L.A. ;)
All the best in the New Year,
G.Robey
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Awesome, write up, Bob. Having lived in NY for 10 years, I've had some pretty heated times with cab drivers while also successfully diffusing the situation or making them feel bad about their ways but making up a story to create empathy. But each driver is their own nervous system of emotions, fears, thoughts, ego, culture and they all react differently. Some forget it's a service job and instead their car is their own universe where you have to see the world they do or they have the right to yell like a crazy shop keeper.
Like you said about your dad, he knew when to fold them. There's a point where you have to give up on people and understand where they peak and in which departments. And that's when you get out of the car, and do a new Uber, just as long as you can get off the highway. Though if it's cold and rainy and you have luggage, that might sometimes seem tougher than handling a crazy, unskilled driver.
In other news, I've noticed a rise in the amount of drivers who tell me, "I'm going to give you 5 stars," when they drop me off, hoping for me to do the same in return. For the longest time, I didn't know they were rating the riders, though it makes sense.
House of Cards play. What would Kevin Spacey's character do in your situation? I imagine he'd say something to the driver like this: "Listen, this ride hasn't been the peachiest, but you still have the ability to get 5 stars if you turn off that GPS. If you don't, I'll report you and you can find a new job." Though, you might not even have to say the last part.
-Dax
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Been there. Many times. Most sayings are based on fact. When they say someone has big balls, they really have big balls. If you're balls are physically big, that's half the battle right there. You're predestined for a certain level of respect. Your balls lead the way and evryone knows it.
I haven't heard "schlepper" in a long time. My father used it a lot, along with "gonif" or "ganev". He used them both as thief or robber. Everyone knows schlep means to lift, carry or take. Lift and take can be applied to a thief.
My father grew up in Dorchester at a time when there was still a large Jewish community. He also worked in the textile industry. That made him an honorary jew.
Cheers,
Tom Quinn
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report him, twice. oldbob
rwhake
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God, that is uncanny. You've tapped into my psyche. Same issue different circumstances. The trouble with really reasonable people. We let a lot of stuff slide because we don't want to make trouble. Can nice guys win and get what they want, or do you have to be an asshole? I guess I just have to remember to stand up for myself. If I'm really put off and pissed, I need make a big deal about it because it means the other guy is way out of line...cause I'm so damn reasonable.
John Brodey
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Guy was probably getting a Time + Mileage pay. It's typical of Driver jobs these days.
I feel you, though, on the mental gymnastics one goes through in those situations.
It wasn't until it was explained to me that I am an imposing physical presence, despite not seeing that in myself, that I understood why some people thought I was yelling at them. I'm not buffed out by any stretch of the imagination, simply height weight proportionate in this day of extreme Body Mass Indexes.
An articulate person with command of language during a heated or emotional exchange will appear to be more forceful in my opinion.
More simply, your words were better than his words.
Thanks for the daily missives, You have helped me to identify the areas I was frustrated with and by during my tenure in the biz.
Regards Allen (Alien) Craft retired road dog.
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Be careful. I never have any of these drivers drop me off at my exact house. Always blocks away so they don't know where you live.
Danny Jay
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Bob, be yourself.
Don't put energy into the driver. He will have to fight his fight tomorrow again...
And don't worry about the rich...
How much life have you got left?
Let it go, as your gut told you.
The rich are only a reason for you to be envious.
They are not happy. They are rich. And sure, certain things are easier for them but happiness ain't it.
And if it makes people happy to throw their weight around then I guess that's what they should do. But oftentimes it makes them just look ridiculous.
Keep doing what you are doing. You're great at it!
At least most of the times;-)
Happy new year!
Eric Harle
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You're no wimp. You spoke up for yourself, and then correctly sensed that letting things escalate with a blue-collar hothead could result in a fat lip, or worse. Did he win? Well, you're the world traveler and he's the driver, so I don't think so. It's a like rude waiter. All you can do is stiff him on the tip and tell the manager and get on with your life. As for the assets, or lack thereof, would you trade jobs with any of your buddies at Aspen? It's not a lack of assertiveness, you just took a different route.
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Very personal Bob. Good one.
Benjamin Hunter
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Great writing, Bob. Really resonates.
Happy New Year to you.
Joe Swift
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Screw that. Save your bullets for when you *really* need them.
Good for you for holding it together.
(Can't say I would have been able to hold off though...)
Happy new year, Bob!
Josh Nelson
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Wow. Very interesting observance. Cultural? Maturity of reaction? You are east coast morphed west coast, therefore, maybe you would have dealt with it differently here? LA/CALI, more crazies there? More accepting and laid back than the east coast? Maybe age related decision - wisdom superseding argument over small stuff. If you'd reacted differently in this country, you could have jeopardized safety of all...don't think you whimped out but definitely think the driver should be reported, you should receive a refund, and this guy should not be making a living driving..he's too volatile, lacks the requisite communication skills, as well as the cognitive and logical abilities to be doing it...I won't drive on the highway in LA even though I've been going there for over 20 years - it's too complicated..
Patti Jones
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First off, happy new year, Bob.
Second, thanks for sharing this. I have always admired your transparency, and sharing things that most wouldn't have the courage to.
You have no idea how deeply this piece spoke to me. Thank you (I think).
I believe you did the right thing. In the big scheme of things, this was unimportant. You took the high road and probably saved yourself a stroke. What I have learned, however, is to call things quickly - and when I encounter situations or people like this, get out of them quickly - and get out. Literally. There would have been another Uber to get you within minutes, especially in LA. There are times in business and personal dealings when I find myself entangled in very similar situations and I have a choice to endure, or not. As I near 60, I choose to not endure...to call it, to be vocal and factual about it, but expecting little, and exiting on my terms.
You did the right thing. And, it's clear to me, you're ok. In the big scheme of things. Thanks again for sharing.
Be well.
Alex Lopez Negrete
PS: I hope you did report this f*****g a*****e to Uber. He gives them and his trade a bad name. And, you are probably doing him a favor.
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Reminds me of the part in Grace Jones' autobiography where Tina Turner gets the part of the Acid Queen, and Grace doesn't: "There was always someone in the way until I worked out how to make myself the one who was in the way of others."
Buffy Visick
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Do a property swap with someone in New York when the weather warms up. You WILL get over it.
Robert Bond
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I'm also 62. This story really hit home for me. I'm a university graduate (dean's list) with an honors degree in music. But I never had a career in music. I tried to. For awhile. But I lacked the confidence. Introverted by nature, performing didn't seem to be in the cards for me. I wanted to be a songwriter. But a songwriter like in the old days -- I wanted to go to work in the Brill building and have Frank Sinatra and Aretha record my songs. And I tired, off and on, for the next 40 years. I won some songwriting awards, got a few covers of my songs, even a publishing deal, but it never amounted to much. I always expected one thing would lead to another and my career would gain some momentum. It never did. So, I worked as a hospital lab technician. Now, I'm retired. I'm still writing songs, still sending them out there, still trying. In my half-assed way. Like I've done my whole damn life.
Happy new year, Bob!
Best regards,
Steve Hardy
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I feel your pain. My parents did not hesitate to "get in people's faces" when they thought they were being shafted or ignored. Sometimes those confrontations got heated. A couple of times they ended up in court, like when Mom and Dad wanted the right to view my scores in a 3rd grade achievement test and the school board thought differently.
At first I was proud that my folks "took no shit" and were willing to "stick it to the man", but as time passed, and "the man" was often a parent to one of my friends in our small town, I became embarrassed.
In my quest to not be like my parents I went the opposite direction. I stayed quiet and got along. I didn't rock the boat.
But at age 57, like you I can now look back and see that there were times in my life where I needed to disagree, speak up and call someone out but didn't.
Those lessons we learn as kids stick tight and are hard to shed. The sad truth is that when future situations arise where speaking up might not only be acceptable but necessary I still can't promise that the old ingrained lessons of my youth won't kick in, leaving me looking in the rear view mirror at yet another instance of "should I have said something?"
Cheers, from a fellow traveler on the lifelong road of self examination.
Jim Blaney
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In my humble opinion, you should call Uber and report the driver. He has no business of lighting into you the way he did, especially considering the mistakes he made taking you and Felice home. Uber's CEO Travis Kalanick wouldn't stand for that behavior if he were a passenger; why should you? I'd make the call!
Happy new year, and hope 2016 is both a productive and prosperous year for you.
Live richly,
Aaron Koral
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I sometimes feel that way too, Bob. More in relation to "playing the game" at the office. I've fucked over a few times by people in the office playing politics. These are the assholes who get ahead by stepping on others and don't give a shit. I've never been that way; never been ambitious enough, I guess. Why? Well, I've been known to cut off my nose to spite my face in the past. But really the answer is, I couldn't sleep at night. Could you? I'm betting you couldn't. You're a nice guy, it's not a crime.
Amy Primeaux
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You know the expression grow a pair of balls? Sure, we all do. But I think the saying is misused. Balls are quite sensitive. Even the softest hit hurts. So if you want to be tough, grow a vagina. The good ones can take a pounding and enjoy it.
I used to enjoy the fight, not anymore. Now I prefer the backseat where I still can defend myself without the pointless arguments.
You needed to get home right? And you did. If he took too long or charged too much, Uber has a button that allows you to complain in anonymity. And so you'll get home safely, pay the right fare, have lost a bit of time, but won't get shot by some crazy independent contractor that's had absolutely zero background check for gun ownership or anger management.
Mark Dorfman
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I'm having a hard time understanding why you want more out of life. It seems to me you have it pretty good. You get to do a job (it seems) you like, you get to go to cool places, you have love in your life, and you get to hang with intelligent people. The people I know who are uber-rich don't ever sit back and enjoy what they have; they're always nervous about losing it and about the next person higher.
You do realize you're having a life crisis over a stupid limo ride gone wrong, correct? Doesn't that seem a little fucked up?
In my worldview, complaining is for wimps. I'm sure I have fewer assets than you and I LOVE my life. I get to do some of what I want and I have lots of people who care about me and I have tons of fun. And complaining is reserved for when I'm in true physical pain and something needs to be done about it. Otherwise my cup is very full even when I don't get my way. And I'm not a simpleton, nor can my optimistic attitude simply be explained away by the fact that I live in flyover land. I've just made a conscious decision to be happy and experience joy whenever it comes anywhere near my orbit. You might think about trying it sometime, although then it might be hard to find things to write about. But, I can tell you from observation of multitudes of unhappy, striving people (most of whom have an exponentially larger net worth than me), my way is pretty damn nice in comparison.
It seems as though you find your happiness when you're surrounded by bright people. Do more of that!
Jenny McCourt
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.......great entry bob.........we all are born with a disposition that is genetically hard-wired to us........we can move the needle through need and experience, but we essentially are who we are.......you can't paint with such a large brush, and while it sounds cliche, YOU are the only YOU.......best in 2016 and beyond!............
Tommy Allen
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" pinball machine of b.s." What a great line.
Ironic that there's so much bullshit in America and we can't even say the word.
Mark Moffatt
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Happy New Year. Me too. So what? Had our life been that bad? I think being nice and letting it go has probably cost me around $1,000,000 in earnings and I am not throwing that number out but just putting pen to paper and tallying the costs of being walked over. Once again, so what? I have a lot of friends, a decent lifestyle and a family. I won. So many unhappy assholes.
Michael Becker
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I have no idea how Uber works. I refuse to use it because it is not about sharing, it's about gaming the system for the founders and investors ( don't ask me what I think of Airbnb- sharing? No, it's renting out a room. Sharing is free)
But I understand that uber costs less than regular limos and cabs, and offers greater availability so...
That said, I live in a neighborhood where cabs don't go- well they do come here now that there are the green outer borough cabs. So we have always had dial cars aka car services. These are about one third the cost of yellow or green cabs. Why take über if I can use my local service? But many of the drivers barely speak English and have no idea what is below 125th street. Drivers who can't figure out how to get to 57th street!! It's not even amusing. It's beyond annoying even though it's really cheap.
Since it's a cash ride- when my drivers behave like your driver, I get out and don't pay. Of course being female they are less likely to attack me, but you never know.
I've done it in yellow cabs too- not pay! only once did the driver lock the door on me so I bit him- that was 30 + years ago, I doubt I would do that now.
Since I imagine you charge the rides with Uber, I'd put a hold with the credit card company on the ride.
And next time, first thing you say when you get in is how you'd like to go. In NYC these days most of the drivers ask how you'd like to go since they don't want problems with all of us NYC control freaks
Though I do not see the value of yelling at these drivers, their lack of service and knowledge infuriates me too-hence the no payment.
Money talks, if reason and politeness doesn't. But biting that driver - on his hand- was probably the best thing I ever did with a rotten driver. Though I was afraid for weeks Id get some disease
Regards
Amy Krakow
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The way I see it, Bob, there are moments. Moments where you, and you alone, can turn the tide in your life - not anyone else's. That won't be the last one. But I encourage you the next time one comes along, just once, do it. Stand up in it and push back. So you don't go the whole run without having done it at least once.
Chris Gilbreath
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Forget about it? Are you fucking kidding me?
Do you really want someone else to go through this? It sounds like this guy was completely out of order, out of control, and should be out of a job. It's not revenge. It's accountability.
Do you have other experiences with this limo company? Will you ever use or recommend them again? Is it fair to the owner to not give him a heads up and a chance to make it right?
If I were his employer I would want to know about this… would not want to risk my business and good will by having this goon on the loose… and I would make amends.
Bob, you must have been shaking. I would have been. It's not fear, it's adrenaline, and I know that awful feeling. Your body is telling you to hit the guy or run. Your brain is telling you neither is appropriate. Your brain is right but your body doesn't know it.
Call Uber? He's lucky you didn't call the fucking police. I think if it were me I would have gotten out of the car and called Uber. But in the actual moment, who knows.
I hope you didn't tip him!
Rob Falk
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Dear Bob
I have a feeling that you're going to hear a lot of this: "pick your battles".
What do we gain by challenging people who are volatile? I can tell you from experience. Standing up for yourself can take many forms. Fight back with your fists and you may feel good for proving to yourself that you're not a wimp, but in the long run you'll gain nothing but a feeling of shame for having let yourself get lured into that pit.
Taking in the bigger picture, it's the work of a lifetime. In places where you can apply patience and respect, bring that to the table. You already do. Aren't you counting that? You have already been changing the world, one small exchange at a time. Applying kindness and a firm application of reason. If someone is endangering you, get out of the car. Enjoy the wind in your hair.
Your fan,
Kristina Stykos
- totally rocking my rags in Vermont and taking shit from nobody
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Happy New Year! I enjoy reading your letters, the stories, the comparisons, the questions you ask - and you sure ask good questions!
About the GPS- I do not wanna add or take your driver's credibility, I'm not saying who's wrong or right; you can buy standard GPS pretty much anywhere but then you can get an upgrade for a delivery truck, or a 5-ton truck or a semi truck or a bus and I'm sure they have one for a limo too. They all have certain settings that will customize the driving directions to your vehicle and/or exclude certain routes because you can't fit...
Now, missing a destination is inexcusable, an address is an address, but his GPS may have been setup to always park with passenger side at a destination... That would take him via a slightly different route than you'd take in your car.
But then GPS without our basic common sense is pretty useless too...
Thank you, all the best.
Martin Jordanov
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Bob, it's the last weekend before we all have to go back to work after New Years. Pour some bubbly. This is too dark!
Love ya!
Thomas Moore
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"Don't start it, but if it comes to you don't step back". Easy to say but harder to live by and a great mantra cos there's only 2 camps and YOU know where you stand.
So much about what you blog about is captured in those words. Be honest with yourself and be strong enough to be you!
Cheers
Pete Moses
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Bob, can so relate to this..... This is gonna have my head working overtime, but thank you for writing it.
My problem with this issue is: if I do win, on behalf of someone else, I'm plagued by enormous guilt. It simply robs me of the joy.
But is the feeling of inadequacy better?.. Depends on the situation I guess, it's a new struggle every time. But we can do it!!! :)
All the best and a happy new year,
Simon.
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This hit home. And it will for a lot of people though I doubt many will admit it. It is this kind of stuff that makes me read you every damn day even when you go through one of those two or three week periods where I start asking "what's the point?"
And then I get something like this in my inbox an i am reminded why i read you every damn day.
Thanks.
Bill Evans
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You've HAVE gone your own way, and you are an inspiration to thousands of people. You make your living doing what you love to do. He's made a series of bad decisions to be driving a limo on New Year's Eve, and he knows it. You're the better man, not hitting him. You've evolved. He's still living in darkness.
Thanks,
Jason Charles Miller
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Interesting story. I can relate. In brief, here's what I've discovered.
It's okay to let a lot of stuff slide. Small minds sweat the small stuff. Drama queens love drama.
On the other hand, only let stuff slide if you're genuinely okay with it. if you're not, don't do it. It'll haunt you, make you feel bad.
Pick your fights carefully.
Don't over-react (we're back to not sweating the small stuff).
The good news is - when you say 'no' clearly (not loudly or aggressively) you send out an energy that makes it work. It took me a while to learn/understand this. It's very liberating.
Barry McCabe
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you've done the right thing - 100%.
Just imagine how you would've sounded like if you had reported him, if he had gotten some kind of punishment. What then? You would've been right and could've grinned a big grin and what, felt good about yourself? Surely not.
But you are right, that's what society and that's what humans are about: getting ahead of others, fighting for the biggest chunk, being right all the time.
I guess my conclusion would be: If Uber can't hire qualified people (and we know their business is hiring whoever wants to, which is crazy, really), I wouldn't drive Uber.
Have a great 2016 and stay healthy.
Tobi Friedrich
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Yup, forget about it. Pick your battles. What do you gain by beating a fellow human being with more problems than you can ever imagine? If you'd engaged this guy and soundly defeated him (verbally or physically), it would have been a hollow victory over a competitor who wasn't in your league.
More importantly, let's go skiing! See you in less than a month "Best Bro"!
Stuart Milsten
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Subscribing to you email has been the best Christmas preset ever.
James Stewart
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Report the ass. Obviously he's been bullying his way around customers too long. His business is customer satisfaction based. You were the customer. You were paying. You deserve quality service regardless of the balance in your bank account.
Gina Hughes
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Awesome! Fight it!
Let him be at war but you should just keep a calm voice and ask the next punk those claims but ask them as questions, to HIM! No one can blame a question. Imagine asking a guy like that, "Who's paying you to operate the car? Why not shut the fuck up, operate the car and ill worry about dictating to you where to go, if you can even handle that?
Anyway Happy New Year Bob! Love the Emails!
Jonathan Mariande
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The driver sounds like a TOTAL jerk and I'm glad you got home safe and in one piece!!!
katie bradford
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I've seen enough spy movies to know that when your limo driver is going the wrong way, you're being kidnapped. Then, when you call him on it, the doors will lock, the glass partition will slide shut, and poisonous gas (or, if you're lucky, tranquilizer mist) will start pouring in.
You may look like Goodwill dressed you, but--if it makes you feel any better about yourself--clearly what's in your mind is valuable. Which is why they grabbed you.
Hope that answers your question.
Danny Biederman
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Dude, that guy was clearly PSYCHO as well as INCOMPETENT.
You were his hostage. You actually did the smartest, safest thing. Look at Sandra Bland: she spoke up, she knew her rights, but she's dead.
I'M WITH YOU, BOB.
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Report his ass. Protect the talent (YOU). Make sure that psycho never bullies anyone again. But under the circumstances, in the immediacy of those moments, you were WISE. Dude, you're ALIVE!!!
Peace and Happy New Year, Bob!
Alicia Echison
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Blessed are the feet of the peacemakers
Michael K. Clifford
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After living most of my life pretty much in the vein you describe, always the bridge builder, ever giving yet more benefit of the doubt... I have concluded that sometimes/usually it's actually better for everyone to simply STOP people.
Using TRUTH. In slowly escalating intensity, well, actually they usually only get a couple additional passes as I allow my patience to ebb, then I have NO problem going to fucking nuclear fast.
Doesn't happen often but when it does and I question myself later invariably I realize that's the ONLY way SOME people get it. And guess what, oddly enough they usually back right down and it even seems with a certain respect.
Perhaps that's what your father may have discovered?
People WILL run over us if we let them, and those same people typically respect hard core POWER unleashed, not that they are intimidated, though likely some are.
Bullies need a beatdown sometimes, when they have it coming and diplomacy fails - GIVE IT TO THEM, Bob!
And if you're like me, even if it has no effect...it sure does feel better than getting railroaded!
Hey wouldn't hurt to try it next time, make it your own social experiment... DG
dggworldwide
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Jeez. No, Bob. You haven't. You're a winner, you've followed your heart and your art and your sensitivity has gotten you into all kinds of trouble a lot of times but a helluva lot more times it's saved you, and won you friends and admirers and respect all over the place.
And you can live with yourself in a way a lot of people can't.
Sorry your year got off to this kind of start - but don't let the bastards get you down.
Have a great one.
A fan,
Nick Davis
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Do the next guy a favor and report his fucking ass. You should be entitled to a refund.
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Perhaps it's time for you to move to Canada? We still say please and thank you here :)
And you can succeed financially while retaining your integrity (although maybe not in the music biz).
I've enjoyed your newsletter and hope that you can still find the financial success you're looking for. It's not just for the bad guys!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts so regularly. Always interesting.
Harvey Beck
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I hear ya Bob...
You tell it like it is.
Not sure I have anything else to add...
but sometimes you can't win.
The other side is too dumb, too ignorant to question their own choices...
Once you step into their sandbox... you've lost.
And unfortunately, there is no way to make absolutely sure that you won't step into their sandbox.
Let's both just be happy you made it home alive!
Happy New Year my friend!
Brian Forbes
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This is exactly what I needed to hear.
Thank you.
Roem Baur
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Maybe a do-over would have yielded the millions you often reference. But it most likely would have also prevented you from developing your unique talent for introspection and articulation.
We are all much better off with the more reflective, insightful Bob of modest means.
Scott Kauffman
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I want to wish you a wonderful 2016. I always appreciate it when I open up my emails on the iPhone and I see your name with the "unread dot" beside it.
I too am 62, born in 1953, and I know, based upon your sentiments and your attitudes and your convictions, that we share similarities that must be attributable to the great era that we grew up in. Speaking of dad's, my father was the kind of guy to "point out" my grammatical errors. In my previous sentence, I deliberately opted to say "we grew up in" instead of my dad's version (the correct one) "in which we grew up". It simply doesn't matter enough to me to be THAT precise in language. I enjoyed hearing about your dad, and I could picture him. My dad was a one of a kind CPA turned management consultant with a competitive streak second to none.
I resented his ways back then - I miss him very much now that he has gone. I have resorted to emulating his behaviors. They are very much engrained in my DNA.
Enough ramble, just wanted to say hi and thanks!
Dave
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…"everything's momentary in our society, it's a pinball machine of bullshit"…Excellent! Even when I don't agree with you, I always appreciate you…Happy New Year, and thanks.
Doug Kahan
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Holy shit, Bob. This is so fantastic and I relate to it so much. Coming from a passive dad, but also a man of common courtesy, this dilemma rings true for me as well. When to give firm boundaries, and when to hold a mindful, open heart when dealing with aggro assholes.
Food for pondering, and I appreciate the vulnerability that you share per usual. Happy New Year, sir.
Kevin Berntson
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The story from "Cordle to Onion to Carrot" by Robert Sheckley explains your angst quite well. You can find it in his collection "Can you feel anything when I do this?". The gist of it is that some people are nice pearly onions, and some people are carrots, they like to create trouble. An onion is nice because they want to, not because they cannot get nasty. But it does take both onions and carrots to make the stew!
Best,
Ramchand Burra
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I would have Lit into him!! There is no excuse for his attitude. EVERY GPS will screw you at one time or another, and, YOU know how to get to your home better than anyone. He should have accepted your suggestions graciously and listened to you.
P.S. I DRIVE an Entertainer Coach for a living and we HAVE to know where we are going "or else" we will be looking for another occupation..FAST.
Ron Jones
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People can't help themselves we're mechanical, the bigger picture is that everything is like a clock - roses bloom on cue, dogs bark on cue and people are angry or emotional ...on cue. If there is wisdom to acquire it's being compassionate with the driver who loses his shit, who indeed might be a psycho. The truth isn't that the rich have it better because they don't stand for it, it's that if you really want to be a Free Man In Paris if you really want to be unfettered and alive then you know the pointlessness of freaking back on some poor sap who ultimately is no different than you in how mechanically he goes about being upset moment to moment.
bob
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You are a great writer that deserves much more than you have gotten but you are one of the only few voices I value!
Ken Seider
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A bullet doesn't care if your rich or poor or black or white or Jewish or Muslim! The guy was a psycho asshole! Don't second guess what you did! You were smart and got to live another day! You have it good! A lot of rich people are very unhappy. In the grand scheme of things you will forget this ! Enjoy your life! Fuck everybody but you cannot be reckless and endanger your life or family! Your not a wimp!
You are intelligent! Isn't it nice you get to do what you love! You have the world by the balls so now go write more as we are waiting for it! If you love what you do than you are rich! You got it made! Take care and happy New Years !
Regards,
Jac Berman
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Yeah -- you had every right to assert yourself with the Uber driver, Bob. Maybe next time?
Michael Philip Kaufman
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I'm a limo driver and am around other drivers constantly. Most are chill and fine - you need to be to live in traffic. Yours was an outlier and acted like a psycho. He may have just gotten beat up by an entitled passenger and was taking it out on you but no excuse. If it's a large company i'd report him as aa driver who was stubborn with a scary short fuse. And say "don't send that driver again". If it's some small company is let it slide and never use them again.
Limo driver rule #1 is ask the passenger if they have a route preference.
Michael Olsen
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Your Mom would be proud of you. That's enough.
Hank Barry
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Happy New year.
Sorry to hear it started off with such non sense . I Wish you had video taped it.
Then taken the time to out and make a short film of it by adding some production value behind it. Make it a small movie with you narrating over it for shits and giggles.
Then somehow get it to him so he could see how it all really played out. And what a fool he sounds like.
That would have been some fun.
Thanks for the emails. They are always a fun read.
Regards.
Tony Lazzara
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You only have so many fights in you. Pick yours carefully. Not every transgression is worth a fight. After 20 years of trial work, most of mine are used up. Just a different point of view.
Michael Busch
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Sitting in a similar situation now. Just found out that my high school friend is a CEO and I am a schlub whose wife lit into because I let myself get pushed around by my selfish relatives.
Avoiding conflict and taking one for the team got me this crap pie.
TJ
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I'd make sure his ass was fired. He's not that way just with you, he's that way with everyone.
Sally Stevens
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Ignoring the larger picture — the driver's a psycho and he knows where you live. And where Felice lives. You were right not to escalate.
Greg Conniff
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You hit a nerve there, Bob. This year, or more correctly, a year ago last summer, two of my relatives jacked 90% of my inheritance.Neither were in dire financial straits; one's a retired high-school guidance counselor, married to a stockbroker, (also retired; they live on Lake Wylie, SC) who inherited from the sale of her late father's multi-thousand acre Indiana farm, the other, a former bank VP who later ran a liquor store for 20 years, with his late wife who left him several millions from the logistics business she built after she retired from a lucrative career with Stella Cheeses.
Both of them acted like I should be grateful to them for the ten percent of what my mom had insisted for decades should all go to me, her (formerly) sole heir, a little under a quarter mil, the majority of which was interest on my late father's death benefits. (Mom was frugal and mostly lived off Social Security; the rest, she invested with my cousin's husband) I've weighed my options, and I can prove what my uncle, the bank VP did; not so much my cousin, the guidance counselor, but in the interest of not living with a vengeful heart and a chip on my shoulder, and because my late mother would have died again from the shame, rather than the slow bone cancer that eventually took her, I shook it off. Your post caused me to re-think.
It really is only money, but what kind of message does that send? I'm not retired, I can make more money, but maybe my family should be embarrassed; they didn't all do this, though some benefited, that weren't involved. I'd hate to see my other cousins' kids end up like my uncle and cousin; maybe if Mom could see from heaven what went down, she'd be happier, if I took 'em to court and the cleaners? I guess I have to decide if I'm too focused on my career, too afraid of what others think or just too big a pussy to enforce my mother's dying wishes.
You shoulda reported that jackanapes driver; if you don't, you're just inflicting him on someone else.
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You skipped a grade too? I skipped first grade...
Toby Mamis
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