Monday 18 February 2013

The Women Of L.A.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBiR2rKU69U&feature=youtube_gdata_player

We're in the midst of a creative renaissance.

Facebook is dying, geeks get all the press, but we're living in a heyday of art. It's the majors' worst nightmare, from the networks to the labels to the studios. They used to be in control. They had the money needed for production and had a lock on distribution. If you wanted to play with them you needed to kiss butt and sell out, be who they wanted you to be.

But now those days are through. The means of production are in the hands of the proletariat. And distribution is free. For all the B.S. about cable, our national television set is YouTube.

Everyone can play.

But that does not mean everyone is good.

But if you're fantastic, and willing to play for the long haul, be great for years until the audience catches up with you, you can become a cultural icon overnight, like DJ Lubel.

What I like most is the backlash. Those who've been doing it forever yet haven't broken through themselves:

http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/women-la-earns-a-shaming-421710

That's when you know you've made it. When you've got haters. When others are complaining you're taking their place in line. If you haven't been accused of being misogynist, dated and politically incorrect, you're too bland to make it. Yes, today it's all about edge. Monoculture was so nineties. When we all watched the same manufactured crap on MTV. Today it's all about being an individual. Starting out in the trenches of nicheland, waiting for your rocket ship to ubiquity.

And it all depends on creativity. Art. Inspiration.

Money comes last.

Credit PSY. With that horsey dance. Come on, that's what made the video so successful. And juxtaposition of a too-old, too-chubby singer with oodles of production. You're supposed to be young and thin, like the models at Fashion Week. For all the hype fashion gets, it's truly irrelevant, it's a way for the untalented to stand out. Because if you're talented, it's what's on the INSIDE that counts!

Come on, take a look at DJ Lubel. He's got what's called a "weak chin." If he were better looking and trying to make it on network TV he'd get plastic surgery, he'd have to!

THE RULES

1. Repeatability

If you don't want to immediately click to replay, you've done it wrong. It's not for once, it's for MANY!

2. The Rules Are Made To Be Broken

The pros will tell you to cut to the hook immediately, that no one has time unless you're immediately great. But the flip side is if virality kicks in, it will cause those caught up in the tsunami to spend time, just to figure out what all the hype is about.

So in this case, you've got an intro that works better the second or third time through. You see the first time you watch long enough to get hooked on the song, then you want to go back and see what you missed!

3. The Concept

Contrast the personal with the mainstream. Everybody wants to get laid, believes he can get laid. But what's the reality?

4. Position Yourself With Facts

IT'S THE SECOND BIGGEST CITY IN THE COUNTRY!

Yup, you should be able to get laid in L.A. But you CAN'T! You've seen the SoCal lifestyle everywhere from the box to magazines to rap videos...and you want to get a piece of that yourself. And in this everyone's a winner culture, where you get a sports trophy for participating, you think you can win the L.A. game too... But you CAN'T! Not unless you're beautiful, famous or rich. Normal doesn't work. No one cares if you went to an Ivy League college. It's the opposite of the east coast. It's all the NOW! Who are you NOW?

5. Know Your Technique

It's Moviemaking 101. Bring in the sound from the next scene in this one. You think you can make it with no skills, that the equipment is enough. But this is untrue. You can get a Pro Tools rig, but that does not make it SING!

6. Cameos

Pauly Shore, Mr. Belding and Jaleel White?

You think you want stars, you want someone hip, but the truth is EVERYBODY knows these characters, you juxtapose them from losers to winners and your audience finds it HILARIOUS!

7. Lyrics

If you're bothering to say something, it'd better be good.

8. Hooks

Without them, you're nothing and nowhere. The chorus is established quickly, getting the audience to nod its head.

9. The Story

You've got to have something to say. At 1:01 when the tale begins, you're enraptured, the blonde who does a 180 upon seeing the geek with the primered car is PRICELESS!

10. Images

The woman looking around the room for the bigger, better deal at 1:30 is so REAL!

11. REFERENCES!

They tie you to the audience! Bland is for Mariah Carey and the rest of the laughable pop songstresses. Come on, when the guy references RUNYON you laugh hysterically, that's where all the upwardly mobile girls work out in L.A. Hell, you've got to be beautiful to score some of that first class dick. And there's Canter's and RAGE and even CASA VEGA, the Valley's Mexican hangout! And when the whole thing breaks down to show the regular women of the Valley there... The juxtaposition between fantasy and reality is so jarring as to have more truth than the 6:30 news. It's like having DJ Lubel star opposite Angelina Jolie, or be the love interest on "The New Girl." Hollywood has lost touch, truth is online.

12. Truth

The BUTTS! At 2:06! Everyone has a great body if they starve themselves to death. If you haven't seen these butts in L.A., you're BLIND!

13. Insider References

I'LL NEVER GET RID OF MY 516!

Don't play for everyone. A true artist sneaks in stuff that only the few will get, but these few are the ones who spread the word!

14. The Dream!

I'll blow Ryan Murphy! Join the cast of "Glee"! Go to Soho House for free!

That's L.A! That's what traditional making it is all about! Most people never make it, but you can short cut all of that, have the desirables come to you, if you just put one foot in front of the other, challenge convention, and do something so damn good we can't help but tell everybody else.

15. Mashup Genres!

In mainstream media everything is narrow, genre-specific. When suddenly we're onstage in the Broadway moment, our entire lives come into focus. We've done everything, watched TV, read books, gone to plays...this guy is JUST LIKE US!

16. THE PIECE DE RESISTANCE!

At 3:46!

It's unexpected, it's like "I Sing The Body Electric" at the end of "Fame." And when the woman in the balcony starts singing about a hand job...you're SOLD!

17. The Finale

Most people can't finish. But DJ Lubel does.

"So what do I do?"

MOVE BACK TO NEW YORK!

That's what most do. They're not up to the challenge. They're not willing to get skinny, rich and beautiful. They're not willing to do the work and make it. They want their college degree to count. But in L.A...IT'S MEANINGLESS!

As is your degree from Berklee, Syracuse, even Yale Drama School. All that stuff is passe. Now it's all about your work. You learned the skills along the way, from PowerPoint to Final Cut Pro. Now what can you do with it? SHOW US!

And you won't have to tell a soul. All you'll have to do is post it. The vultures, everybody looking for something great to pass on, will do so.

"The Women Of LA" is already a success. You don't need to reach a hundred million, that's for Bieber and the rest of the kids afraid of losing their power. No, you just need to get a toehold, get a presence, and keep working, the audience will carry you.

It's the Frank Zappa paradigm. "The Women Of LA" is straight out of his oeuvre. Even down to the primered front fender, from "You Didn't Want To Call Me." Yes, we loved Frank, because he knew it was all B.S. He didn't want to slime himself, get dirty and sell out, he wanted to do it his way. Now EVERYBODY CAN!

Ignore those people looking for a record deal, money, some way to get ahead.

It's all on you today. Can you reach down deep inside and titillate our fancy?

DJ. Lubel did.

Fire up this video. Click on the gear and select the highest quality, 1080pmqHD. And if the image stutters, call your cable company and upgrade your connection. Because bandwidth is what it's all about. Today you need the tools.

And once you've got them...

It's all up to you.

We'll be watching.

Or not.


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