Potpourri

1. "The Examined Life: How We Lose and Find Ourselves" by Stephen Grosz

http://amzn.to/1eAR7lP

I think everybody should read this book.

We live in a funny world, everybody's a winner, everybody's complete. But I must say I've got more questions than answers. And reading this book stimulated me more than anything that's passed before my eyeballs in months.

I was turned on to it by Michiko Kakutani. Yes, the reviewer Carrie talks about in "Sex and the City." Ms. Kakutani had it on her ten best list. (http://nyti.ms/IYE8Rn) And I was looking for something new to read, and I don't want to be disappointed after "The Goldfinch" and Ms. Kakutani had the Tartt book listed as number one, so I decided to check out the sample chapter.

I got hooked.

What Mr. Grosz does is tell stories about patients, thinly fictionalized.

He's not a psychopharmacologist, he's not a feel good guru. Rather he sits with his patients five days a week trying to figure them out, learning about himself in the process.

There are few definitive answers, like life, there are only guideposts. But the insight is breathtaking. I especially liked the chapter wherein he stated closure was a fallacy. There are things I can't get over that make me feel bad about myself. Mr. Grosz said to avoid just this syndrome. Society tells us to get over it, but maybe we just can't, maybe we learn how to cope as it returns to our consciousness again and again.

If you think you have all the answers, this is not the book for you.

If you think you're all right, you just need some business guidance, this is not the book for you.

If you sometimes feel isolated, or believe you're working against yourself, or that you keep repeating the same patterns.

THIS IS YOUR BOOK!

2. "The Scent of Pine" by Lara Vapnyar

http://amzn.to/1aiPw4X

Reading "The Examined Life" made me want to meet Ms. Kakutani. Because I read about the book nowhere else and it made me wonder what made Michiko pick it. Makes me think she's got more questions than answers.

And now I'm dying to meet Ms. Vapnyar.

I read a review of her book too. And went to download the sample chapter, but it wasn't available yet. That's what I hate about hype, it's all buildup for something that's got nothing to do with me. Kinda like the Golden Globes. If I can't immediately watch the movies they promote, what's the use?

So I downloaded some of Ms. Vapnyar's previous work and couldn't get into it.

But after finishing "The Examined Life" yesterday, I remembered that "The Scent of Pine went on sale the previous Tuesday and downloaded a sample.

The initial few pages didn't hook me.

And now I can't put it down.

What intrigued me about Ms. Vapnyar was that she moved to the United States from Russia and shortly thereafter became a novelist. Huh? I mean even if you studied English in Russia, were you ready, were you fluent enough in the language?

But I have never ever read such an accurate description of two people falling in love. The awkwardness, the desire, the exchange of stories. It's so funny, we're wandering in the wilderness and suddenly someone is listening to us, or vice versa, and we go down the rabbit hole and immediately want to know everything about them.

The book is set half in the U.S. and half in Russia. Half today, half yesterday. And I kept thinking that maybe the Russians had it right. In America everybody's trying to be rich and famous. In Russia, it's about living, the stories, what happens between me and you.

If you want to know what happens between two people, read this book.

3. "The Billionaire's Playlist: How an oligarch got into the American music Business" by Connie Bruck

http://nyr.kr/1kym9lQ

She called me. I didn't have much to say, no one at Warner who knows anything will talk. And the article gives you essentially no insight into Len's travails at the music company.

But it does give you a whole lot of history.

This is not the most readable article. But if you wade through it, and you're gonna have to buy the "New Yorker," the whole thing is not available for free online, you will recognize the divide between Len Blavatnik and yourself. We think we want to be rich and famous like the musicians. But the musicians want to be rich and famous like the bankers. And the bankers are beholden to the oligarchs. And you don't want to know how the oligarchs made their money. Only here, it's delineated.

Are you willing to put your life on the line? Literally.

Are you willing to go to jail?

Not me. Maybe that's why I'm not an oligarch.

But Oxford took Mr. Blavatnik's money. For a school of government. Huh? Money talks, as Ray Davies once sang. If you're rich enough, you can buy anybody.

Also, the description of Lyor Cohen's legal travails... Funny how time has a way of paving over history.

Furthermore, Ms. Bruck makes the point that Blavatnik wants to pay the acts less and the execs via incentives. Is this the future of the music business? I don't think so. Is it the future of America and the world, quite definitely. If you think being an honest, forthright citizen who votes makes you win, you've got no idea what the game is.

4. "Meanwhile, she said, a team of reporters and editors has begun work on a major 2014 project: 'a deep look at the global rich.'"

http://nyti.ms/1lQavAN

"She" is the editor of the "New York Times," Jill Abramson. The above was from yesterday's article by the public editor, Margaret Sullivan.

This is the story of the age. The gap between them and us, the rich and the poor. And it is not pretty. The rich are supposed to have earned their essentially tax free status by creating jobs for the rest of us. They're supposed to be wiser, benevolent dictators. The truth is so far from this it's scary, but people don't want to believe it, because it eviscerates their hope. You don't want to play if you cannot win.

This is why we need the "Times." But whether you think we need it or not, enough people do to fund this kind of journalism.

Expect to be very angry in the coming months.

They came after Christie and they came after Ailes and in the U.K. they went after Murdoch. Despite screwing up Iraq, the press has gotten hold of something and with bullhorns but no facts possessed by the bloviating right wingers at Fox...expect turmoil. Money drives this country. And they're going after the money. This is a better movie than ever plays in the theatre. This is real life, this is not reality TV.

5. "The motivation comes from a belief that almost anything can be mastered if you're willing to put in the hours to master it. If you're going to do something, do it as best as you can."

Jeff Shiffrin talking about his daughter Mikaela

http://nyti.ms/1ft24ep

It's that time of year again. When the Winter Olympics fill the screen during the doldrums of February. And our best hope for a skiing medal is the aforementioned Mikaela Shiffrin.

What I hate about hype is you don't know how much is true.

But everyone agrees that Mikaela Shiffrin didn't race, she practiced.

Now think about this... Imagine if instead of posting to YouTube and Instagram and tweeting and facebooking about your music you took ten years out and practiced your instrument, only occasionally playing live... Then you might be world class.

In other words, just showing up does not make you world class. You've got to have the hunger and the desire when no one is watching and listening.

And yes, it does help to have rich parents.

Mikaela Shiffrin is already the slalom world champion.

Not everybody can win.

But someone will. And it'll be less about desire and promotion and attitude than plain hard work, mostly in the wilderness.

6. Shaun White

http://nyti.ms/1d26qBz

Nobody likes him.

The story of the year is the death of snowboarding.

Yes, despite all the Olympic run-up, sales are nosediving, as is participation. Sure, skis are mini-snowboards now, but the real reason is snowboarding is possessed by Gen-X, and like kids from every generation, from baby boomers to Alex Keaton, they want nothing to do with what their parents are up to.

But the "New York Times" doesn't know this, they haven't reported the story yet, but it's been in the "Boston Globe" (http://b.globe.com/IMwdpI) and "Vail Daily" (http://bit.ly/1ePEFiF). So the "Times" runs a feature on Shaun White, it's as bad as the talking head features on TV, conceptually anyway.

But the writer gets it right.

People don't like Shaun White.

Oh, his sponsors and those who don't know him do. But in the community? He's a loner who's out for himself.

And the story is interesting, but the point is most people have no idea what it takes to make it, the determination and self-sacrifice. Chances are if you're a bro everybody adores, you're never going to triumph.

Many successful musicians are pricks. They had to be, to make it.

7. "The Crash Reel"

thecrashreel.com

I met Kevin Pearce.

Huh?

Mr. Pearce was the only person who could beat Shaun White. They emphasize how Mr. White is not a bro in this film.

But that's not its point.

Kevin Pearce was the snowboarder who crashed in the halfpipe just before the last Olympics, in Vancouver, in 2010.

He had a traumatic brain injury.

This is the story, primarily of that injury.

I wish everybody could see this film, but with the cacophony that is media today, chances are slim. But you can pull it up on demand on HBO right now, and you should.

Yes, the initial part is all about snowboarding.

But then comes the injury.

What happens to the losers?

That's what we never read about in America...those who don't triumph, those who endure endless hardship. Like Kevin's parents, who have another child with Down's syndrome.

He knows he has it! The kid with Down's is frustrated about it!

And wants Kevin not to compete anymore.

But Kevin won't listen. To his family, his doctors... He wants to go back out on the hill.

Thank god he realizes he just doesn't have it anymore, before he has another TBI, traumatic brain injury, like his compatriot at the end of the film, whose arm is paralyzed and whose speech is slurred and whose only desire is to get back on the hill.

You have to know when to give up. Just because you didn't win at one thing doesn't mean you can't win at another. And what is winning anyway? That's what the Russians have right, the lower class ones. They know life isn't something you tote up on a scorecard.

Watch "The Crash Reel" and you'll be embarrassed to watch football, because when you see those brain scans, they're even worse!

And yes, Kevin comes from a rich family too. His Irish father has a great American story, he built an empire on glassblowing. He overcame his dyslexia to do it.

So, some people slip through, they overcome great hardship and difficulties to do so.

But don't believe just because they did you can too.

And don't be disillusioned if you don't make it, just pick yourself up and...

EVALUATE YOUR DIRECTION BEFORE YOU PUT ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF ANOTHER!

You don't want to be like that snowboarder after his third TBI who is barely functional. You don't want to turn fifty and be lugging your equipment up stairs to play covers for those not interested still believing you're one step away from making it. If you're having fun, if you're paying the bills, more power to you. But if you've sacrificed everything, have no house, no children, no car, no health insurance because you think there's a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow...eek.

8. "In the end, I made my decision the way I make all decisions I've brutalized with analysis - by giving up and awaiting logistical intervention."

http://nyti.ms/1hRpYk9

This is why we read. To find out we're not alone, that there are others just like us.

I have a hard time making a decision. Taking risks too. I so much want to make the RIGHT decision that...

I end up waiting for enough information for the choice to be clear.

But oftentimes that's too late.

Unsure of what day to fly, I wait, and then can't fly any day, because it's gotten too expensive.

It's a thrill to see yourself elsewhere, to feel connected.

And that's my job here.


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