Summer's Almost Gone

But that did not prevent it from being a hundred degrees for nearly a week in SoCal.

And it's hard not to think about global warming/climate change, but what struck me so much was how early it got dark and how hot it was at the same time. As if the seasons were changing but someone was asleep at the wheel.

The thing about summer is it only lasts two months in Southern California, July and August. June is too foggy and cool. On the east coast exuberance reigns and everybody wrings out every ounce of hot weather before the leaves turn. But even though it's oftentimes hot in early September, not so hot this late though, we in SoCal adhere to the fiction that life changes with the opening of school, vacation is over, we all must become more serious.

But live long enough and you start to disconnect from the education paradigm. You have no desire to go back to school, achievement is no longer paramount, and you slow down and observe the little things that have been there all the while, but you never seemed to notice.

The way the sun is orange in your rearview mirror. I was driving downtown to eat Mexican with Dawes and to the left of me is mountains, behind me is a radiant orb, and even though the thermometer is in triple digits, I don't always need the air conditioning. Because with the angle of the sun lowering, hot just doesn't feel so hot.

I know that sounds ridiculous. But so much of life cannot be articulated, only felt. Even though we have words, it's astounding we can even communicate. We're ruled by feelings. And we can be anxious or thrilled but sometimes we're just in the sweet spot, when everything feels all right.

The songs sound better on the radio. You decipher lyrics you've been mystified by for decades. You gain new insight into your favorites. It's like nature is offering its rewards up only to you. In the cocoon of your mind. And you're stunned that you've never felt this way before, and won't always be able to feel this way in the future.

As Don Henley sings, we've only got so many summers and so many springs. And life becomes more about missed opportunities than future successes. You make peace with yourself, who you are, know that soon you will be dust, it happens to us all, and as much as you're caught up in the rat race, it's an irrelevant league that can be ignored, just like baseball or football, no matter how much each of them is in the news.

This weather won't last forever. Unlike most of the country, it'll never get cold in SoCal. But the leaves will change, you'll need a jacket, even if there's no nip in the air. You'll start to yearn for spring, for the longer days more than the warmth, the feeling of rebirth.

But right now we exist out here in a curious limbo. One in which the heat tells us we're at the apex of the summer season, but the light tells us otherwise. It's like going on your last date with the significant other you agreed to break up with, or the one shuffling off to college. It's bittersweet.


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